"Take the A Train"
by GolferDDS

Comment:
Hello from the Critique Club -

This photo didn't do very well in the ratings did it? I gave it a six because it met the challenge and was a little better than average. Technically it is pretty well done. The focus is good, the suitcase and the guy being sharp and the back wall almost sharp. The lighting is good being a greyish day. I think the colors look a bit washed out. I would have fiddled with it a bit in post processing.

However the composition leaves a lot to be desired. I think this picture would have benefitted from the rule of thirds. If the guy had been over to the right, looking down the tracks, more of the tracks showing might have improves the idea of the endless wait for the train to come. The central focus of the shot, the place where the viewers eye ends up is that big black blob of a suitcase. While it adds to the story (big bag, stuffed, probably long trip, maybe somewhere interesting) it is not very interesting visually. The bag is too black and too big, it unbalances the scene.

The composituional lines here are pretty basic, maybe too baix to be interesting. The figure is right in the middle making a strong upright, The train tracks are straight across (well, a little bit diagonal) and also centered. The exact center of the picture is the mans hand holding his suitcase with a handerchief, why the handkerchief? it is distracting. There is nothing in three of the rule of thirds points and the suitcase in the fourth. With all those straight lines, the barrel distortion from the lens bothers me. I do like the repeat of the yellow stripe top and bottom. The signs on the wall, the lamp post and the strair railing all seem to be cluttter. Also the way the railing grows out of his back emphasizes his poor posture.

Wait - It's not a total loss. The main elements here are striking and worth noting. The station, the packed bag, the intent look on the mans face, the way he looks down the tracks and the tracks themselves are all worthy parts of the picture. What to do? Hmmm.... get the empahais on the guy. Move him off center. Move the bag. Lose the hankie. Maybe try a landscape view so there are more tracks to look down? Pay more attention to the junk in the background, like move so the stairs are in a different place. And jazz up the color in post processing. You've got the yellow lines, they work. You've fgot the blue signs, maybe they could be balanced by a blue luggage tag, or even a red one. Leave the guy grey, like the day and the stones and the station. He works well like that, any color on him would be a distraction.

Please remember that this is just one opinion, mine, and I am far from an expert.

Kitty in the "No Felines Zone"
by kandyj

Comment:
Aawk! what happened? THis picture is a ten!!!! where did all the points go?????

The Burnout
by alanfreed

Comment:
Aawk - what went wrong? I meant to return and change my nine to a ten but I got busy. Maybe everyoone else forgot too. I thought this was a real winner.

Seen Better Days
by connie

Comment:
Aaawk - I hate it when my tens turn up not in the top ten!

Okay.... Who Brought The Ball?
by autool

Comment:
Cracked me up. I needed a good laugh, you get a ten just for changing my mood. Great photo.

Nowhere to go
by GinaRothfels

Comment:
Hello from the critique club -

This is a nice photo - I gave it a 6. It is well executed but doesn't have anything to make it stand out from the pack except for humor. The votes would agree, no great scores, few terrible scores.

This is what I like: First of all the humor, it really is pretty funny to see a car in a cage from the American perspective. I have never seen such a thing. we lock our cars up in dark garages. It gives the car a personality to see it in a cage, It seems to be looking out, pining to get going. And the landscape works just right for that impression. In front of the car is a lovely green field and maybe an intersting town in the distance. I like the colors of the photo, the stone and metal are all pinkish brown, contrasting with the green outside. The silver car stands out nicely. The focus is good from the forground all the way to the background. Lighting and exposure are excellent and probably were difficult to get right.

What doesn't work so well is the composition. It is too centered and then not quite straight at the same time. With the car so exactly in the center and the cage around it having such rigid lines, the barrel distortion from the lens is very apparent. The detailed design on the cage door cuts right across the tail lights, creating a conflict between the most visually interesting parts of each. There aren't any compositional lines that lead the viewers eyes into, out of, or around the picture. My eyes keep coming back to the circles on the gates being in the way of the tail lights and number plate.

There is a story here, the car and it's driver are not going anywhere today, even though it is a lovely day. But then what? The story isn't quite interesting enough and the photo isn't quite appealing enough. As Grocho Marx would say, "Close but no cigar".

Goo Goo Doll
by Gracious

Comment:
Just me I guess - I was that nine, I should have given it a ten, I love it!

Spoon Fed
by nards656

Comment:
hey, what happened?? This was definately a 10!!!!

Amber Brkich of Survivor II: Australia
by alanfreed

Comment:
I thought the color one was stunning.

Roadside Repairs (Portrait of a friend)
by Azrifel

Comment:
I like this photo. I gave it a seven which seems to be the best it got. Looking over the coments it seems like people either didn't like the weather or didn't like motercycles. I'm not so fond of this gloomy weather either but it makes a great picture and certainly adds to the mood of the day and the roadside repair. He keeps his coat on and his helmet- it must have been raw and the metal looks cold. Nor am I much interested in motorcycles but do Love portraits and pictures that tell a story. This is a real story teller. He's riding with a group, or at least a partner, something has gone wrong, he has to fix t himself, there isn't a garage or a warm place. He looks toatlly intensly absorbed, maybe stubborn even? That face is central to the picture.

I do agree with the commenter who said it looks tilted and should be rotated a bit. But that will be my only negative comment.

I like the colors, almost a monochrome except for the red cycle, the yellow warning lights and the guys face. It emphasizes the three most important things. I like the conflicting diagonal lines of the sidewalk and the leaning bikes. I like the way the broken bike looks black and dirty while the red bike (whos riders is presumably in a warm pub) looks shiney new. I like the writing on the car, on his helmet and on the red bike make a triangle. The picture as a whole is self contained, the lines bring the viewer back to the central theme. Good use of the rule of thirds, his face is at one intersect and NOTHING is at the opposite intersect which makes the face the real focus.

I really like this picture, a lot can be read into it.

Comment from the critique club - remember this is only one amateurs opinion (mine).

Message edited by author 2002-12-20 16:35:18.