she had a stage 5 heart murmur and was on medication to stop heart failure .. and has had many life threatening health issues over her time here .. the most traumatic of all was the mast cell tumour she had in her bottom .. which they removed .. and going on the chemo afterwards nearly killed her .. of course we had to stop that medication and hoped for the best .. that was several years ago ..
in all my years on this planet i have never felt so close to a dog .. she evolved from a dog into a person .. our connection was just magic ..
on her last day she woke up in the morning coughing and panting .. they thought it might have been the bronchial problem she had that she was on a puffer for .. so they did an ultra sound to see what was going on ..
it revealed that her heart had become so large due to the heart murmur that it was making it hard for her to get oxygen into her lungs ..
it was not a hard decision to make that her her time here with me had come to an end ..
i was adamant that all the lead up to the injection i was to hold her and keep her close .. she passed very peacefully partly because she had had a slight sedation for the ultrasound ..
the vet who has dealing with katee over the years was as over come as i was .. as was several of the staff .. as katee had become one of their favourite little ppl ..
the offered to drive me home, or follow me home or just come and spend some time with me ... i chose to take her home by myself ..
she lay on her bed in the passenger seat .. looking like she was just sleeping .. i held my hand on her body as i have for years when driving .. just to feel our connection ..
when i got home i placed her on her favourite white fluffy blanket .. and took some photos .. it was the only thing that stopped me breaking down completely .. 'this is one of those photos ..
i waited a couple of hours for the cremation lady to come pick her up .
during that time i just held her and cried ..
when the cremation lady came ... she was absolutely lovely .. spent the time talking about katee and i feel was very sincere when she said what a beautiful little dog ..
i carried her out to the van and placed her on a bed they had for her .. and said goodbye ..
i have never felt such a connection with another dog .. and i have never felt such grief .. even tho i have lost so much in my life ..
i felt posting in dpc was the right thing to do as she has been a part of this community as much as i have been ..
one of the things i am so happy about is that she won the extended free study a while ago .. which was quite a miracle .. and when she won i did feel that it would be the photo that defined her and captured her very essence ..
it is definitely going to framed when i am able to cope with seeing her every day ..
its five days since she has left and the tears just wont stop ..
i have connected with quite a few ppl who i met initially here in dpc and now are friends in facebook who have been thru the grief of losing their beloved companions .. it has helped me so much the outpouring of concern and understanding that i received in facebook ..
i know a lot of you would have seen the posts i put in there .. but in case there are a few ppl here that i'm not friends with in facebook i felt that i would let you know here this sad knews ..
thankyou for being the wonderful community you are .. you have no idea how much dpc has helped me thru some very tough times over the years .
thankyou from the bottom of my heart ..
ps .. it might seem a bit gruesome to take photos of your little friend when she has passed away .. but i just had to capture her for the last time .. it was a necessity ..
Heart rending photo, Roz. I hope things are getting a bit better for you. It takes a long time to get over the loss of a beloved pet. It took us about two years to be able to move on but we have a new girl in our lives now. Sometimes that is great but sometimes the differences in personality (and she is the same breed) just make it painful.
My heart goes out to you Roz. I was out having some lunch when I came across your post, I choked up and shed a tear to the point I had to stop reading until I was back in my car. I think its wonderful you captured these images of Katee, not gruesome, but a part of your healing process. It is a beautiful photo.
I once said in a post that Katee will always be with you in life and beyond. I'm very sad to have read about her passing but the tears of sadness are also of joy for a life full of love and happiness. We all got to know her through your wonderful photos and commentaries and now we must pay her farewell. She will be missed (((hugs))) Jo
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