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08/30/2006 06:28:37 PM · #1 |
NEW YORK -- A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Attorney General Alberto Gonzales said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement.
He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Gonzales said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values.
They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns', but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.
As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say,'There are 3 sides to every triangle'."
When asked to comment on the arrest, George W. Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes."
Aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.
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08/30/2006 06:29:57 PM · #2 |
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08/30/2006 07:12:51 PM · #3 |
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08/30/2006 07:14:18 PM · #4 |
LMAO!!!
Originally posted by Di:
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08/30/2006 07:18:05 PM · #5 |
Leroy,
You have too much time on your hands.
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08/30/2006 07:18:22 PM · #6 |
You may all scoff, but I suspected this all along. I always knew those math folks were up to no good. ;)
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08/30/2006 07:30:33 PM · #7 |
| Haw haw haw! that is absolutely hilarious! |
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08/30/2006 07:50:14 PM · #8 |
Originally posted by kirbic:
Haw haw haw! that is absolutely hilarious! |
Figured you'd love it :-)
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08/30/2006 08:14:58 PM · #9 |
| Let the man who is without sine cast the first stone. ;>þ |
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08/30/2006 08:53:05 PM · #10 |
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08/30/2006 08:59:17 PM · #11 |
| That kind of humour appeals to the lowest common denominator! |
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08/30/2006 09:16:32 PM · #12 |
| Clearly the whole is equal to the sum of the parts. |
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08/30/2006 09:18:37 PM · #13 |
| maths & science can be considered "terrorists" to religion, according to extremists. Good one, Leroy |
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08/30/2006 09:44:19 PM · #14 |
OMG Leroy, if this is original you have actually redeemed yourself!
jejejeâ„¢
R.
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08/30/2006 09:52:28 PM · #15 |
Originally posted by Bear_Music:
OMG Leroy, if this is original you have actually redeemed yourself!
jejejeâ„¢
R. |
It's original from someone, but if you google a phrase like "weapons of math instruction"...
Thnaks for posting it, Leroy. ;>þ |
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08/30/2006 09:58:01 PM · #16 |
Ohh, noooo... LOL... not my work. Was sent to me. Just thought I'd share the laughter.
Redeem myself... yeah, right :-)
 <==== more my style :-P
Message edited by author 2006-08-30 21:58:50.
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