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06/24/2004 09:39:29 AM · #1 |
Why did the Elephant wear his tennies?
The ninies were too small and the elevenies were too big |
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06/24/2004 09:53:09 AM · #2 |
What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephant running over the hill?
"Here comes the elephant running over the hill!"
What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephant running over the hill with sunglasses on?
Nothing, he didn't recognize him.
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06/24/2004 10:16:58 AM · #3 |
Where do elephants have their reproductive organs?
On the soles of their feet... if they step on you, you're f***ed.
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06/24/2004 10:26:07 AM · #4 |
How do elephants hide in cherry trees?
They paint their toenails red.
Does it work?
Well, have you ever seen an elephant in a cherry tree?
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06/24/2004 10:27:45 AM · #5 |
Why shouldn't you go into the jungle between 2 and 4 in the afternoon?
That's when the elephant's are jumping out of trees.
Why are Pygmies so short?
They go into the jungle between 2 and 4 in the afternoon.
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06/24/2004 10:31:42 AM · #6 |
What do you call that squooshy stuff between an elephants toes?
Pygmies
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06/24/2004 10:36:19 AM · #7 |
What should you do if you come across an Elephant?
Wipe is off!
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06/24/2004 10:39:32 AM · #8 |
Originally posted by BooZon:
What should you do if you come across an Elephant?
Wipe is off! |
Oooo! Put the kids to bed... this thread is heading south! :)
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06/24/2004 10:41:48 AM · #9 |
Originally posted by space amoeba:
Originally posted by BooZon:
What should you do if you come across an Elephant?
Wipe is off! |
Oooo! Put the kids to bed... this thread is heading south! :) |
It's subtle adult humour, if you know what it means, you are old enough to hear it :)
Edit... here to hear
Message edited by author 2004-06-24 10:42:55.
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06/24/2004 10:53:58 AM · #10 |
After referring to Andre' for some assistance... here are a few favorites:
1. How do you stop an elephant from charging?
Take away its credit cards.
2. What do elephants do for laughs?
Tell "people" jokes.
3. What's large, grey, and goes in circles?
An elephant in a revolving door
4. What's grey, weighs 5000 lb. and wears glass slippers?
Cinderelephant
5. If you see an elephant in your car, what time is it?
Time to get a new car!
6. Why do elephants have grey skin?
To hold their insides together, silly!
7. What did the cat say to the elephant?
Meow.
8. What did the grape say to the elephant?
Nothing...grapes can't talk!
9. How can you tell an elephant is under your bed?
Your nose is squished against the ceiling.
10. What should you do with a blue elephant?
Cheer it up!
:o)
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06/24/2004 11:37:25 AM · #11 |
How do you tell that an Elephant has been in your refrigerator?
There is foot prints in the butter.
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06/24/2004 11:43:29 AM · #12 |
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?
Elephiono.
Message edited by author 2004-06-24 11:43:57. |
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06/24/2004 12:22:43 PM · #13 |
Here's another off-colour one.
What do you when you see an elephant coming down the hallway?
Swim!
I know, I know...
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06/24/2004 01:08:31 PM · #14 |
ROFLMAO!!!
Cinderelephant! muwahhhahahahahahahah.....
this stuff is great, i can't stop laughing !
Why are elephant jokes soooooo funny???
keep 'em comin'.
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06/24/2004 01:36:46 PM · #15 |
How do you get down from an elephant?
You don't. You get down from a duck!
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06/24/2004 01:40:02 PM · #16 |
Originally posted by taterbug:
ROFLMAO!!!
Cinderelephant! muwahhhahahahahahahah.....
this stuff is great, i can't stop laughing !
Why are elephant jokes soooooo funny???
keep 'em comin'. |
Just for you, tater...
1. Why don't elephants smoke?
Because they can't fit their butts in the ashtrays!
2. How many elephants does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two, but it better be a REALLY BIG bulb! ;o)
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06/24/2004 01:45:50 PM · #17 |
How do you know when elephants have been making love in your garden?
The grass is rolled flat and all the bin-liners are missing. |
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06/24/2004 01:58:01 PM · #18 |
Good ones Laurie ! :-D
You guys are killin' me here...heeheehee
ok, I have another one, i've refrained but...
this is off color and really kinda gross, if you find that kind of stuff offensive at all, please don't read any further. How can you tell when an elephant is having it's period?...when your mattress is gone and there is a dime on the dresser. or--what does an elephant use for a tampon?...sheep.
...ducking for cover...
Message edited by author 2004-06-24 13:58:56.
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06/24/2004 02:01:46 PM · #19 |
Originally posted by taterbug:
Good ones Laurie ! :-D
You guys are killin' me here...heeheehee
ok, I have another one, i've refrained but...
this is off color and really kinda gross, if you find that kind of stuff offensive at all, please don't read any further. How can you tell when an elephant is having it's period?...when your mattress is gone and there is a dime on the dresser. or--what does an elephant use for a tampon?...sheep.
...ducking for cover... |
:oP
Gross, but still funny in a bizarre sort of way! ;o)
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06/24/2004 02:13:15 PM · #20 |
what do you call a stingy elephant?
elephantitus [tightarse]
sorry made that one up
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06/24/2004 02:16:10 PM · #21 |
I'm SSSSOOOOO glad this thread was started. I don't kow anyone that truly appreciates good elephant jokes.
==========================
Why couldn't the elephant ride the tricycle?
Because the other elephant didn't let him borrow it.
Why is an elephant large, heavy, and gray?
Because if he were small, round and white...he'd look like an AlkaSeltzer.
Why do elephants travel in packs?
Becasue the one in the midle has a radio.
Why do elephants break up from their packs?
Because the radio batteries run out.
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06/24/2004 02:16:21 PM · #22 |
what do you call a gay elephant that sings jazz?
ella fitzgerald [just made up as well] as if you couldnt tell
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06/24/2004 02:16:49 PM · #23 |
Originally posted by goodman:
what do you call a stingy elephant?
elephantitus [tightarse]
sorry made that one up |
hey, that's pretty good! I like it.
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06/24/2004 03:00:33 PM · #24 |
- how do you fit four elephants in a Mini car?
two on the front seats, two on the rear
- how do you get the elephants out of the car?
throwing a mouse in
too bad you've never seen a car the size of a Mini at the US ;-) |
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06/24/2004 03:12:25 PM · #25 |
Originally posted by carlos:
- how do you fit four elephants in a Mini car?
two on the front seats, two on the rear
- how do you get the elephants out of the car?
throwing a mouse in
too bad you've never seen a car the size of a Mini at the US ;-) |
We have Mini's here. I have even seen some of the old really small ones:) |
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