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08/24/2004 01:07:15 AM · #1
I'm bored... tell me a joke.
08/24/2004 01:14:21 AM · #2
why dont witches wear panties?
08/24/2004 01:23:48 AM · #3
I'll bite...why?
08/24/2004 01:24:55 AM · #4
to get a better grip on the broomstick

(its the only joke i know)
08/24/2004 01:26:01 AM · #5
i've got a good idea, take some photos
08/24/2004 01:28:54 AM · #6
What's a blonds mating call?
08/24/2004 01:45:23 AM · #7
what?
08/24/2004 01:53:31 AM · #8
A man speaks frantically into the phone,
"My wife is pregnant, and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"
"Is this her first child?" the doctor queries.
"No, you idiot!" the man shouts. "This is her husband!"
08/24/2004 01:57:48 AM · #9
Originally posted by grigrigirl:

to get a better grip on the broomstick

(its the only joke i know)


That is good! I gotta tell my boss that :)

(I'm sitting bored in my office at the moment)

Message edited by author 2004-08-24 01:59:05.
08/24/2004 01:58:35 AM · #10
Here are a few really bad jokes....And I hope I don't offend anyone but if I do let me say I'm sorry in advance.

Q-What is the best thing about dating a homeless woman?
A-You can drop her off anywhere.

Q-What is the difference between in-laws and outlaws?
A-Outlaws are wanted.

Q-What should a woman say to a man she's just had sex with?
A-Whatever she wants. He's sleeping.

Q-Where does virgin wool come from?
A-Ugly sheep.

Q-How do you spot the blind man at a nudist colony?
A-It isn't hard.

Q-How can you piss off your husband while making love?
A-Call him from your cell phone.

Q-What does the bride of a Polish man get that's long and hard on her wedding night?
A-His last name.

Q-What's the down side to a threesome? A-You could disappoint two women instead of just one.

Q-How do you know you're really ugly?
A-Dogs close their eyes when they're humping your leg.

Q-Why are hurricanes named after women?
A-Because they arrive wet and wild, then leave with your house and car.


08/24/2004 01:59:49 AM · #11
Originally posted by TooCool:

What's a blonds mating call?


I'm soooo drunk!

What's an ugly blonds mating call?
08/24/2004 02:08:34 AM · #12
Originally posted by TooCool:

What's an ugly blonds mating call?


I SAID I'M DRUNK
08/24/2004 02:09:24 AM · #13
Originally posted by TooCool:

I SAID I'M DRUNK


What's a brunettes mating call?

08/24/2004 02:10:03 AM · #14
what?
08/24/2004 02:10:41 AM · #15
Originally posted by TooCool:

What's a brunettes mating call?


The blonds are all gone....
08/24/2004 02:14:20 AM · #16
Vulgar inappropriate joke to follow:

A man goes to Vegas, gambles for the night and wins $1000. He goes up to his room, and tells the man at the front desk to send up their finest woman.

He goes up to his room, and soon hears a knock on the door. He lets the lady in, and says âI just won $1000, what can I getâ

She looks at him and says, âI only give hand jobs for a $1000â

He goes âWhat!! $1000 for a hand job?â

She says âI give the finest hand jobs in Vegas, look out the window. You see that Ferrari? I bought that giving hand jobs.â

So he gives her the $1000 and gets the best hand job he ever had.

The next night he gambles again, and wins $5000, goes to his room and says send her up again.

When she gets up to the room she tells him a blow job is $5000.

âWhat!! $5000 for a blow job?â

She says âI give the finest blow jobs in Vegas, look out the window. You see that Lamborghini? I bought that giving hand jobs.â

So he gives her the $5000 and gets the best blow job he ever had.

The next night he gambles again, and wins $10,000, goes to his room and says send her up again.

When she gets to the room he says âI just won $10,000. I want some pussyâ

So she walks over to the window, and says âYou see thatâ

âYa thatâs Circus Circus. Donât tell me you own that tooâ

And she replies âNo, but if I had a pussy I wouldâ
08/24/2004 02:15:35 AM · #17
What is the first thing a blonde sees after sex?
- the dome light

How do you get a blonde out of a tree?
- ask what time it is

08/24/2004 02:18:00 AM · #18
What do Michael Jackson and Walmart have in common?

-Boys pants half off!
08/24/2004 02:20:05 AM · #19
what does michael jackson and the boy scouts of america have in common.
- no girls allowed
08/24/2004 02:29:54 PM · #20
According to Mythology, what is the only way to get rid of a Muslim Minotaur?
08/24/2004 02:32:08 PM · #21
...Tell him you don't have time for any Bull Shiite!
08/24/2004 02:33:20 PM · #22
LOL... that made me giggle! ;o)
08/24/2004 02:36:46 PM · #23
//www.big-boys.com/articles/blondestar.html
08/24/2004 02:41:51 PM · #24
How do you get a redhead to argue with you?
Say something.

How do you get a redheads mood to change?
Wait 10 seconds.

What's safer: a redhead or a piranha?
The piranha. They only attack in schools.

How do you know a guy at the beach has a redhead for a girlfriend?
She has scratched "stay off MY TURF!" on his back with her nails.

What do you call a redhead with an attitude?
Normal.

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night?
A redhead.

How do you know when your redhead has forgiven you?
She stops washing your clothes in the toilet bowl.

Only two things are necessary to keep a redhead happy.
One is to let her think she is having her own way, and the other is to let her have it.
08/24/2004 02:43:49 PM · #25
As the property of a Redhead, I attest to all of the above being true:)
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