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08/22/2007 06:04:24 PM · #1 |
Don't always think you're smarter than us... BTW - I received this from a WOMAN, so I don't want to hear a single complaint. (Thx Maria!)
This was written by a guy... it's pretty damn smart.
Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!
I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing. I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with their heart.
FOR EXAMPLE:
One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me." I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"
So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...
"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."
She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"
Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."
We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.lol
I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all
dear, let's go to the cashier."
I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."
Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"
I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."
And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
Alright girls. Repost this if you agree. Hell even if you disagree, repost it.
Men, repost this because you have balls...
{end of quote}
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08/22/2007 06:11:46 PM · #2 |
| Hahahaha, best story ever. |
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08/22/2007 06:14:54 PM · #3 |
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08/22/2007 06:17:21 PM · #4 |
| i like the story but it seems a little too perfect to be real, tho i did enjoy it. |
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08/22/2007 06:30:36 PM · #5 |
Oh man thats classic..........maybe I should pull that on my wife with the kitchen remodel...
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08/22/2007 06:46:35 PM · #6 |
Originally posted by rossbilly:
Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her. |
HILARIOUS!
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08/22/2007 06:52:04 PM · #7 |
| Wow, the truth, why didn't men try this sooner....lol |
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08/22/2007 07:52:53 PM · #8 |
OMG, That is sooo funny. LOL!!!
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08/22/2007 08:12:21 PM · #9 |
I actually thought it was pretty damn cleaver! But....still no sex! That hurts MORE!!!!! ;p
Things might fall off from lack of use...rofl! |
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08/22/2007 08:26:18 PM · #10 |
Originally posted by doctornick:
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What he said! |
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08/22/2007 08:31:04 PM · #11 |
lol that was the greatest story I ever read.... lol
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08/22/2007 09:46:45 PM · #12 |
Originally posted by _eug:
Originally posted by doctornick:
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What he said! |
:-DD
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08/22/2007 09:51:52 PM · #13 |
| OMG!! thats funny right there, ROFLMAO!! Great one!! |
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08/22/2007 09:53:16 PM · #14 |
Too funny........ Reminds me of the world's shortest fairy tale my dad told me:
Once upon a time, a man ask a woman to marry him. The woman said no....... And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing and hunting and played golf alot and drank beer and left the toilet seat up and farted whenever he wanted..
THE END
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