What could I have done better? - DPChallenge Forums

Nikon AF-S DX NIKKOR 18-200mm f/3.5-5.6G ED VR II

06/16/2003 10:45:37 AM · #1

(I mean other than putting the camera down and going to meet her?) I like the image, but something is wrong. Is it the angle of the stairs? a little help please.

Message edited by author 2003-06-16 10:47:15.

BobsterLobster

Fujifilm FinePix S3 Pro

06/16/2003 11:00:47 AM · #2

IMO, too many interesting lines on the right hand side are taking the viewer's attention away from the girl.

eloise

Sony DSC-P7

06/16/2003 11:02:59 AM · #3

Originally posted by BobsterLobster:

IMO, too many interesting lines on the right hand side are taking the viewer's attention away from the girl.

I'd try cropping out the balustrade in the foreground-right, starting with just the white plane her elbow is resting on.

Message edited by author 2003-06-16 11:03:13.

emorgan49

Olympus E-5

Olympus 50mm f/1.8 MF Normal Zuiko

06/16/2003 11:15:09 AM · #4

wash the wall?

sagestudio

Canon EOS-5D Mark II

Canon EF 50mm f/1.8 II

06/16/2003 11:23:02 AM · #5

I agree about the lines from the banister. This feels like a modern take on "Romeo and Juliet". Good job.

Jacko

Canon EOS-20D

Canon EF 17-40mm f/4.0L USM

06/16/2003 11:26:31 AM · #6

i think the girl might be too centered. Would probably be better if she'd be more the right ... her gaze looking into the empty space.

Journey

Canon PowerShot G3

06/16/2003 11:41:20 AM · #7

This pic has a nice mood to it. Agree with the comments about the lower balustrade. You might consider recropping OR cloning it out, since there is a nice corner there. Recropping probably would be best. Not sure the border inside (the in-thing at dpc right now, it seems :) quite works for me - it seems to pose a bit of a conflict with other lines here and there.

Kavey

Canon EOS-400D Rebel XTi

Sigma 18-125mm f/3.5-5.6 DC for Canon

06/16/2003 11:57:31 AM · #8

I'd rotate a touch and crop more. Also if there was more empty wall to the left I'd include a touch more.

Have emailed you my cropped version.

Kavey

Message edited by author 2003-06-16 11:58:41.

inspzil

Olympus E-510

Sigma 50-500mm f/4.0-6.3 EX APO RF HSM for Olympus

06/16/2003 12:00:11 PM · #9

I agree with recropping. I'd level this to the lines left from the poured in place wall form lines. I'd crop it to put her right in the bottom corner. I reckon if you want her to be staring off into space, you want to leave the space part. I would first level it to the bottom of the coping piece she's leaning on, cut it off from there down. I'd take off a lot of the right side so she's not quite jammed in the corner, but down there pretty far in the frame. My feelings is that this crop will help intensify the mood of this picture, kind of the "little girl in the big world" mood to it. If you aren't going for this kind of feeling, go to the next post :) I prolly shoulda said that first.

Bob

jodiecoston

Canon EOS-450D Rebel XSi

Canon EF-S 18-55mm f/3.5-5.6 IS

06/16/2003 12:01:23 PM · #10

It's really a lovely image. The tones are really nice, and the subject is wonderful. I agree that if she were a bit more to the right, with more "space" for her to stare off into, it would make more impact, perhaps.

narliss

Nikon Coolpix 5000

06/16/2003 12:05:37 PM · #11

Kavey beat me to the punch, just using my browser I cropped out the banister and the plane her arm is resting on is at a wierd angle, so a slight rotation might help. Moving her a little more to the right to intersect the right third might make a nice composition.

-N

carsten

Canon EOS-5D

Canon EF 24-105mm f/4.0L IS

06/16/2003 12:15:11 PM · #12

Something like this perhaps

06/16/2003 12:21:50 PM · #13

it sure changes the feel of the picture, but yours is more aesthetically pleasing. I totally agree with the common theme above of putting her in the right side of the frame so she's looking to the open space.
As I was shooting it, my eye really liked all the 45 degree angles, but it seems I didn't capture with the camera what I saw in my head.

thanks, you guys - you've all been a great help. More work on it when I get home tonight.

Pedro

ps - I actually took a bunch of her...I couldn't take my eyes off of her. does that make me a stalker? :)

Canon EF-S 55-250mm f/4-5.6 IS

06/16/2003 05:52:25 PM · #14

with a few of the suggestions added...what think?

Message edited by author 2003-06-16 17:53:41.

brentg3

Canon EOS-500D Rebel T1i

06/16/2003 05:57:01 PM · #15

bravo team... This is the best use of this web site

brentg3

Canon EOS-500D Rebel T1i

Canon EF-S 55-250mm f/4-5.6 IS

06/16/2003 06:00:58 PM · #16

I should explain myself, I love the challenges but its times like this when we help each other when it all comes together. Learning through challenges is a long drawn out process (which has some good points) but great sharp short training sessions such as we see here take you to a new level of photographer in an instant..

DPC is great!

Sigma 18-125mm f/3.5-5.6 DC for Canon

06/16/2003 06:07:28 PM · #17

Originally posted by brentg3:

Agreed. Now if anyone can help me FIND her again :)

Kavey

Canon EOS-400D Rebel XTi

06/17/2003 04:48:58 PM · #18

Big improvement.
And Carsten your crop is almost identical to the one I emailed!
LOL
:D

oldwisemonk

Nikon D1X

06/17/2003 05:01:48 PM · #19

I like the revised one more. Just watch her purse on the right edge. Tangents are icky. Give it a little more space to the right of the purse .. just a tiny bit. Make sure it's well included.. or make sure it's obviously cut. Those evil tangents that we all encounter is what led to comic book characters "breaking out" of their frames. Unfortunately, with photos, we can't have anything break out of the photo. So we have to choose. In or out.

Message edited by author 2003-06-17 17:07:57.

eloise

Sony DSC-P7

06/17/2003 05:32:13 PM · #20

Originally posted by oldwisemonk:

This reminds me of a design guideline in Design for Non-Designers - either be *exactly the same* or be boldly different. Wishy-washy stuff doesn't give any strong impression one way or the other. Likewise, boldly crop and make it look like you meant it, or leave more room for the eye to wander.

Or something. Sorry, babbling. :->

Canon RF 24-70mm f/2.8 L IS

06/17/2003 05:55:46 PM · #21

not babbling at all - that makes perfect sense to me. The clearest lesson I've learned here at DPC is that you have to consider everything. there are no accidents in great photography. I'll let you know if I ever do anything great. :)

*edit* and Jerry you are exactly right - I didn't even think about the purse. thanks.

Message edited by author 2003-06-17 17:57:11.

kirbic

Canon EOS R5

06/17/2003 06:47:31 PM · #22

Originally posted by pedromarlinez:

...Agreed. Now if anyone can help me FIND her again :)

And the number 1 reason to suspect you're addicted to DPC is...

...can't put down the camera long enough to meet the girl!

Sorry to rub salt in the wound Pedro, couldn't resist.

oldwisemonk

Nikon D1X

06/17/2003 06:51:39 PM · #23

Originally posted by kirbic:

Originally posted by pedromarlinez:

...Agreed. Now if anyone can help me FIND her again :)

And the number 1 reason to suspect you're addicted to DPC is...

...can't put down the camera long enough to meet the girl!

Sorry to rub salt in the wound Pedro, couldn't resist.

Hahahaha. Nice.

Actually, I'm sure some psychologists out there will immediately categorize photographers into the "watchers" category, rather than the "do'ers." Hence the simplest explanation - you didn't do anything because, frankly, you are just a watcher?

But then... what do these stereotypical psychologists know?

Message edited by author 2003-06-17 18:53:56.