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02/28/2006 07:31:06 PM · #51 |
I guess i am just lucky, not only am I encouraged....she buys me photography stuff. I think its just to get me the hell out of the house, and thats okay. Works for me.
I wish you the best. |
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03/06/2006 01:08:48 PM · #52 |
My whole family is a dream squasher...hubby, mom, in-laws. Doesn't matter what I mention doing, I'm either ignored or bashed with negative comments. I've always wanted to get into photography, and of course I'm always told "that's not a job, you can't do anything with that"! But I can do something with it, I can enjoy it and share it! I haven't done anything to start as of yet, I will see how it goes after I get my new camera delivered. And maybe search for some local courses...
Don't let the negative ppl discourage you...keep doing what you love! |
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03/06/2006 04:17:53 PM · #53 |
| Sometimes it's really hard to remove yourself from someone who is constantly negative. That's why I've found it so important to surround myself with positive, encouraging people who can counteract the negative. |
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03/06/2006 05:18:23 PM · #54 |
| I HAD a wife like that (emphasis on the past tense use of had). |
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03/06/2006 06:11:26 PM · #55 |
Originally posted by yakatme:
I HAD a wife like that (emphasis on the past tense use of had). |
I hear you Robert. And unfortunately that may be the only way I will be able to get any peace with this. I'm heading to a counselor tomorrow for more advice on how I can handle this and possibly find a resolution.
Imagine that...counseling over something as harmless as taking pictures. I could see if I were taking pictures of naked women. Or, it could be worse. I could be hanging around bars and drinking...or be addicted to the "update" button.
Rick
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03/06/2006 06:35:21 PM · #56 |
| I told my wife its a new camera or a boat.......I got my 20D soon after that. |
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03/06/2006 06:52:04 PM · #57 |
| It's a catch 22 cause if you put down the camera to please the wife you could end up resenting the wife. I think the counsler is the best avenue and hopefully you can get her to go as well and work out a situation that will satisfy. |
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03/07/2006 11:04:00 AM · #58 |
Firstly, Rick, best of luck. I hope the counsellor helps you work through the possibilities and that you can find an outcome that works for you.
Originally posted by ragamuffingirl:
Mr. Ed, I was just thinking the exact same thing.... Thank God I'm single!
Okay, what do you guys think of this one. My sister's getting married on Saturday. My older brother and I are both into photography. I have experience professionally shooting weddings. Either one of us would have been completely happy to shoot my sister's wedding free of charge. Originally, that was the plan. Then, the groom's mother decided to pay $900 to someone to come shoot the wedding, and from what I hear this person isn't a particularly good photographer. I'm mad because my sister could have spoke up and said that either my brother or I was going to shoot the wedding, but she didn't.
This Saturday she and the groom were talking about the wedding, and the groom said, "I don't think this photographer is really that good." I told them straight out I thought they were stupid to throw that kind of money away when there were two photographers in the family, and if his mother had $900 she really didn't know what to do with.... I wouldn't have said no. So, my sister said, "Oh you can still take pictures..."
I said, "No. I can't," and left the room. Now, my mother wants me to take pictures because she doesn't think she'll get any wedding photos if I don't take them. I don't want to do it. I don't want to be relegated to trying to take pictures from inside a church pew that are going to come out ever so slightly off center, with the back of grandma's head in it, other people getting in my way since I'm not THE photographer, etc.
My co-workers, one of whom I did her wedding, don't blame me for being mad. One suggested that I shoot the wedding for my mother, but if my sister wants any of the prints, make her pay for them. |
Ragamuffin girl, my first thought is this: Has it occured to you that the groom's mother deliberately didn't ask you or your brother because she feels it more appropriate, given that you are the bride's siblings, for you to participate in the wedding itself as family, as cherished guests, as part of the inner circle? Being the official photographer really precludes most of that as it's much more about observing, recording and thinking ahead and leaves little time for truly participating in the day.
I shot a wedding last year as a favour to a dear friend who, with her groom, had planned a very much more informal and relaxed wedding day than the current tradition. Although I made sure I participated and enjoyed the day too, with the help of my husband being a second photographer with me, it was hard to do that fully, no question.
It seems to be a very spiteful thing to do to charge your sister for any shots you do take just because her future MIL chose not to invest you with the job/ fee of official photographer. It's her wedding day - surely a sister's role is about reducing stress for her sibling, contributing in whatever way she can and being there for her sister and not about throwing tantrums if one doesn't get to take photographs in as ideal a way as one would like. This day is about your sister and her groom, not about you.
Sorry if I seem harsh, but I'm just giving my perception based purely on what you've shared with us in the post above.
Message edited by author 2006-03-07 11:04:43.
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03/07/2006 11:46:41 AM · #59 |
I tend to agree on the wedding front. If you were to be the official photographer, then you wouldn't be attending the wedding, you'd be working at it. You can't do both well. If you are supposed to be shooting it, you don't have the time to visit with your other friends and family - or you'd be missing something important.
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