Hi Janine - Welcome to the Critique Zone!
What a cracking shot - really polished and aesthetically pleasing. Why did it only score 5.7 rather than the 6+ that it was definitely capable of? Partly because DPC voters tend to demand a more 'typical' shot, but there are a couple of things that with 20/20 hindsight hold it back a little.
Technically: Nothing really to say here - it pretty much hits the mark. The DoF for this needs to cover the whole shot and you have, although f5.6 seems a little wide, chancing that it might not have.
PP: Your dodge and burn experiment worked well, I'd say. It's added some really nice contrast to the shot which is obviously critical for a black and white. Normally I'm not a fan of selective desat, but you have used it carefully and it definitely adds in this shot, giving you a real focal point. It could have stood to be a little sharper - in cases like this I will always sharpen after re-sizing down as you will lost the edge in the process.
Artistically: This is all completely subjective, but I think this is where you lost a couple of tenths. Firstly, the angles here draw the eye from right to left (near to far), which is against the natural grain of scanning left to right - immediately the brain is seeing something 'uncomfortable' at the subconscious level. Secondly, the shot is not quite lined up - there was the opportunity to use the bricks to break the shot into thirds and put the lines horizontally across the shot - the slight tilt, I think, hurts the shot a bit.
All of this is just my opinion of course, but hopefully there is something useful here for you? It's a well taken shot and I look forward to seeing more of your stuff.
Happy hunting,
Frank. |