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04/15/2006 02:11:54 AM · #26 |
For I Enjoy Ham's post that won't thumbnail....
The flowers looked alluring, with their brilliant colours waving silently in the breeze. The rustle of the leaves called out to those passing....come closer....breathe in our delicate perfume...just a little closer....
Too late, the victims realized, these weren't ordinary flowers! They were the fabled fleur de noir, flowers of the black hole, sucking their victims down, down, down into oblivian.... ahhhhhh!
Message edited by author 2006-04-15 02:27:57. |
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04/15/2006 02:12:52 AM · #27 |
Horace should of stayed in his little room surfing the net and playing video games all night, like usual. But I suppose it wasn't his fault that he had a toothache. He had seen an ad for Dudley Voychecks Dental School and House of Imports/Exports- inexpensive extractions and rare goods a specialty. Little did he know that the place was really a front for a sick, twisted, perverse ring of blackmarket tongue transplanters. Unfortunately, he was a perfect match for their latest client, Donny "the Armpit" DeMarco, head of the notorius 'Bad Clam' gang. When 3 comely young girls entered the 'examination' room and started feeling his tongue and squeeling in ecstatic delight, he at first thought he had died and gone to heaven. "This is better than any of my porn sites and all my 900 numbers put together!" he thought. But then the she-devils took up their tools and went to their torturous work, and horace screamed and struggled, but was no match for the deadly little vixens, who knew their work all too well. It was over with soon, and Horaces wretched figure lay motionless and bloodied in the chair, never to navigate a 3-D maze or tremble at the site of internet horny housewives again, as 3 innocent looking gals stared down lovingly at the lump of still quivering tongue-flesh in the stainless steel platter before them.
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04/15/2006 02:13:49 AM · #28 |
oops, I guess I'm too slow...sorry :-(
Message edited by author 2006-04-15 02:14:32.
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04/15/2006 07:48:29 AM · #29 |
Originally posted by I Enjoy Ham:
Little johnny liked the dentist but he thought girls had cooties... ewwwww!!!
What happens when something you love and something you hate mix?????
you get the adventures of Johnny and the multicolored mirror thingy that dentists use!
agh.. can;t get the thumbnail to work |
here you go, it is a gif not a jpg
Message edited by author 2006-04-15 07:48:38. |
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04/16/2006 08:10:04 AM · #30 |
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04/17/2006 03:16:14 PM · #31 |
Originally posted by sabphoto:
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Adolescent love is truly a wonderful thing. He searched high and low and was unable to find that "perfect" gift to truly show his love. His camera was broken, the sun was shining, birds were chirping... It couldn't have been a worse day! He wandered all day through his favorite abandoned insane asylum until finally the sun began to slowly fall on the horizon. The weather turned just a few degrees cooler, dark ominous clouds filled the sky. The entire atmosphere turned a pale gray with slight yellow-orange hues. A gust of wind picked up and blew a small piece of paper that had been stuck to a shard of broken glass suspended from the remnants of what was once a window. He turned his attention to this scrap as it fluttered in the breeze.... blowing through the dark, dank alley behind the asylum. Another gust and as if on a mission the tattered scrap changed directions first to the right and then up...higher and higher. As he looked up the first drop of rain fell cold and wet on his cheek. The tiny piece of paper then began to fall as if beaten down by the rain. Slowly, gracefully it settled just beyond the railroad tracks. Some would say it was on the wrong side, but he knew as soon as he saw what was waiting for him, he knew that this scrap of paper was merely fate stepping in at his time of need. A small glimmer of color caught his attention and he immediately ran over.... The perfect gift for his girlfriend. The most unusual bouquet of flowers he had ever seen. It was the perfect gift as unique as the giver and as special as the recepient. It was only fitting that he use this small scrap of paper that acted as his guide to write a small note to go with his gift. In a few words, he was able to express his true feelings...
"Special flowers for a special person... Love, Joey Lawrence"
:-)
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