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08/18/2011 05:51:22 PM · #1 |
Didn't find this posted, so here: //www.clientsfromhell.net
Found this gem there among others:
Originally posted by CFH:
I was designing a book cover that featured the author. He pulled some extremely small images of himself by a well-known photographer off the internet for me to use.
Me: Do you have permission from the photographer to use these photos?
Client: Yes.
Me: Can you ask the photographer for larger image files? These are too small and will be extremely pixelated at the size we need them.
Client: I like the pixelated look. I don̢۪t need to ask permission to use pictures that I̢۪m in. Plus, the guy wants me to pay money for them. |
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08/18/2011 08:16:56 PM · #2 |
"I don̢۪t know quite what we̢۪ll be selling yet. Maybe niches. I̢۪ve heard the niche market is doing really well."
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08/18/2011 11:19:44 PM · #3 |
| First two words on the page: "An client" .... Really? ;) |
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08/18/2011 11:27:03 PM · #4 |
| "I got this email once from some lawyer in Nigeria and when I opened it and clicked the link, the same email was sent it to everyone in my contact list. I thought, hey, this is a pretty smart and simple marketing technique. When I send out this email to the 4,000 people, I want it to automatically forward to everyone in their contact list. Can you have this done for me by tomorrow?" |
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08/19/2011 12:09:31 AM · #5 |
I've submitted several anecdotes to that site, but never checked to see if they showed up. One of my favorites was about a printer that a client wanted me to use in Canada. I created artwork for about 8 different "flavors" of a package and sent high resolution PDFs to the printer.
Printer: I need to you send me the original Illustrator artwork for three of those packages.
Me: OK, may I ask why?
Printer: We can't use the artwork you sent. It's not compatible with our systems.
Me: I worked from a single file, and the artwork was exactly the same for all of them. The only thing that changed was some of the text, so if you can print one, you can print them all.
Printer: Well you have to understand that it's very cold here and we're in a different time zone.
Me: What version of Illustrator do you need? |
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08/24/2011 08:00:39 PM · #6 |
Not a client, but a lead I got yesterday - in his project requirements:
- Have creativity of graphics and images to make bland awareness
it was even funnier when I found out he is Chinese. |
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08/24/2011 08:26:23 PM · #7 |
Originally posted by Art Roflmao:
Not a client, but a lead I got yesterday - in his project requirements:
- Have creativity of graphics and images to make bland awareness
it was even funnier when I found out he is Chinese. |
"Bland awareness" Now there's a campaign I could get behind. :) |
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08/24/2011 08:42:28 PM · #8 |
Originally posted by Art Roflmao:
- Have creativity of graphics and images to make bland awareness
it was even funnier when I found out he is Chinese. |
OMG!!!! Actually guffawed at that. Too funny. |
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08/24/2011 08:53:16 PM · #9 |
Originally posted by scalvert:
I've submitted several anecdotes to that site, but never checked to see if they showed up. One of my favorites was about a printer that a client wanted me to use in Canada. I created artwork for about 8 different "flavors" of a package and sent high resolution PDFs to the printer.
Printer: I need to you send me the original Illustrator artwork for three of those packages.
Me: OK, may I ask why?
Printer: We can't use the artwork you sent. It's not compatible with our systems.
Me: I worked from a single file, and the artwork was exactly the same for all of them. The only thing that changed was some of the text, so if you can print one, you can print them all.
Printer: Well you have to understand that it's very cold here and we're in a different time zone.
Me: What version of Illustrator do you need? |
Ok, Shannon. You sure led me down the garden path on that one.
I actually shouted out loud (SOL?)
and probably scared the neighbors.
Good one.
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08/24/2011 08:55:34 PM · #10 |
| This is old, and as it turns out, not real, but it cracks me up every time. |
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