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09/18/2005 07:47:11 AM · #1 |
I am putting together an ad/mailer to try to get some sr. portrait business.
would this catch you attention???
What would you change ??? |
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09/18/2005 08:02:17 AM · #2 |
| Good photo except for the lack of an obvious fourth finger. I find the text part too drawn out...I think you want it snappier. Different font, too...something a bit more stylish and modern. Just my opinions. |
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09/18/2005 08:05:39 AM · #3 |
Headline might be a bit wordy I think. IMO Need something to grab attention.
Message edited by author 2005-09-18 08:06:07.
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09/18/2005 08:18:21 AM · #4 |
I like most of it but agree with the missing 4th finger. I would also reduce some of the wording, for example on the Our Prints section you have:
Our prints. Our print packages start at $20.00
I would just put: Prints. Packages starting at just $20.00
not a big change but comes of the tongue a little easier in my opinion and not redundant on the "our prints" part.
Good job otherwise.
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09/19/2005 01:37:02 PM · #5 |
very quick tweek
i'd re-shoot your son with the whole 4 fingers showing and change as above :
i'd spend a bit more time on the typography - but i want to go home and photoshop is no page layout app ;)
Message edited by author 2005-09-19 13:37:46. |
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09/20/2005 07:31:05 AM · #6 |
I think there is a couple of ad-people around but what size was this mailing gonna be??? 4x6 card or 81/2x11 folded??? If its a card style idea it will work with the corrections that others have suggested, BUT if your gonna go bigger as example an 8.5x11 folded into 3 like a brochure then it won't work. It may help people to decide how this is going to be delivered as well. As a flyer you'd hang in a laundry mat or supermarket I think it will work fine.
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09/20/2005 09:58:00 AM · #7 |
I agree with what someone else mentioned. Instead of "our cost," "our prints," "quality," and "You'll have fun," I would replace it with "Cost." "Prints" "Quality" and "Fun." Not only does it streamline it a bit, but it makes it more "parallel."
I agree about shooting with all the fingers showing. Right now, it almost looks like he is flashing some kind of gang symbol (which might appeal to some).
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09/20/2005 10:14:30 AM · #8 |
I wouldn't look at this and see "senior portraits"... I would look at it and see "kids portraits" or maybe an ad for a kids related charity.
Most people don't read every ad they come across so you have to use imagery that portrays what you want to promote... the ad itself is nice and clean but it doesn't say senior portraits to me. |
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