Time to laugh!! - DPChallenge Forums

09/10/2005 10:50:51 PM · #3

I have a great one! Not very clean though.

Why do men become smarter during sex?

(because they are plugged into a genius)

09/10/2005 10:57:18 PM · #4

Ok, a little come back for you Mandy. :)

Why do men fart more than women?
Because women can't shut up long enough to build up the required pressure.

he, he

Canon EF-S 10-22mm f/3.5-4.5 USM

09/10/2005 11:01:44 PM · #5

How about this?

What do electric trains and breast have in common?

(they are intended for children, but MEN usually play with them)

digitalpins

Canon EOS-60D

09/10/2005 11:06:00 PM · #6

lol those are good, the last was a nice touch

09/10/2005 11:08:59 PM · #7

Good one, Mandy!

Here's another one.

Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a
bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.

09/10/2005 11:10:59 PM · #8

Why do men snore when they lie on their backs?

-because their balls fall over their a**hole's and they vapor lock!-

09/10/2005 11:18:48 PM · #9

OK so it's gender bashing tonight (good humor of course)

How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me."

09/10/2005 11:22:15 PM · #10

LOL hee hee

Why is a man's pee yellow and his sperm white?

-so he can tell if he is cumming or going!--

09/10/2005 11:24:20 PM · #11

I guess it's just us tonight.

What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
A woman who won't do what she's told

09/10/2005 11:25:04 PM · #12

THE REPAIR

A blonde pushed her BMW into a garage, and told the mechanic that it had died.

After working on it for a few minutes, he had it idling smoothly. She asked, "What's the story?" He replied, "Just crap in the carburettor." She asked, "How often do I have to do that?"

Sigma 24-70mm f/2.8 EX Aspherical DF for Canon

09/10/2005 11:25:59 PM · #13

Why don't women blink during foreplay?

--not enough time---

parrothead

Canon EOS-40D

09/10/2005 11:31:22 PM · #14

Mandy, You are terrible! I am laughing my ass off! Or is that LMAO? I lose track.
"What are the hardest 3 years of a hillbillys life?"
"The third grade"

Sigma 24-70mm f/2.8 EX Aspherical DF for Canon

09/10/2005 11:31:54 PM · #15

Why do women have smaller feet than men?
It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows them to stand closer to
the kitchen sink.

parrothead

Canon EOS-40D

09/10/2005 11:33:06 PM · #16

A Three-year-old little boy was examining his testicles while taking a bath.
"Mama," he asked, "Are these my brains?"
"Not yet," Mama answered.

09/10/2005 11:33:27 PM · #17

THE VACUUM

A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. When it was her turn she rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature.

Her question was "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"

She thought for a while and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

09/10/2005 11:33:32 PM · #18

oh that is funny!!!! LMAO

here is another one!

why does it take a million sperm to ferilize ONE egg?

--they don't stop to ask directions--

09/10/2005 11:36:17 PM · #19

An elderly Italian man lay dying in his bed. While suffering the agonies of impending death, he suddenly smelled the aroma of his favorite Italian anisette sprinkle cookies wafting up the stairs.

Gathering his remaining strength, he lifted himself from the bed.

Leaning against the wall, he slowly made his way out of the bedroom, and with even greater effort, gripping the railing with both hands,he crawled downstairs. With labored breath, he leaned against the door frame, gazing into the kitchen. Where if not for death's agony, he would have thought himself already in heaven, for there, spread out upon waxed paper on the kitchen table were literally hundreds of his favorite anisette sprinkled cookies.

Was it heaven? Or was it one final act of heroic love from his devoted Italian wife of sixty years, seeing to it that he left this world a happy man? Mustering one great final effort, he threw himself towards the table, landing on his knees in a crumpled posture.

His parched lips parted, the wondrous taste of the cookie was already in his mouth, seemingly bringing him back to life.

The aged and withered hand trembled on its way to a cookie at the edge of the table, when it was suddenly smacked with a spatula by his wife..... !

"Back off!" she said, "They're for the funeral."

09/10/2005 11:38:29 PM · #20

DOCTORS VISIT

A young redhead went to see her doctor and told him that her body hurt everywhere.

Wherever she touched caused her excruciating pain.

"That's strange," said the doctor. "Show me."

She took her finger and pushed her elbow and screamed in agony.

She prodded her knee and screamed just as loudly, then poked her head and screamed.

Everywhere she touched made her scream.

The doctor shook his head wisely and asked, "You're not really a redhead, are you?"

"No," she admitted, "I'm actually a blonde."

"I thought so," said the doctor. "You have a broken finger."

09/10/2005 11:39:40 PM · #21

OH thats terrible!!! HA HA LOL!!

Why were men given larger brains than dogs?

--so they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties--

09/10/2005 11:41:33 PM · #22

Why did the blonde woman have a sore bellybutton?
Because blonde men are stupid too.

09/10/2005 11:42:33 PM · #23

My kids sing this all the time...

Beans! Beans!....Good for your heart!
The more you EAT the more you FART!
The more you FART the better you feel...
Beans! Beans! For every meal!!!!