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07/20/2005 01:46:33 PM · #1 |
Kinda' overwhealming is life.
We wake each day, never knowing what life has in store for us.
We see strangers, who we will never see again.
We see aquaintances, some of which we may never see again.
Just reflecting on a few thoughts, feeling a bit vulnerable
after the recent passing of another of my customers, making
3 this year, with another in cardiac intensive care.
All gentlemen I have known now for a few years now, and as
with many of my customers, developed personal relationships with.
We can't hide from life, and the older we get, the more
vulnerable we become to seeing those around us leave.
Make the day count.
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07/20/2005 01:57:54 PM · #2 |
Thanks Brad..Today I needed that. especially today. I too am suffering through a terrible loss that I can't bring myself to say more about. Cherish every day.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 14:09:39.
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07/20/2005 02:01:09 PM · #3 |
You have a very tender heart, and I know it shows through to your customers and friends and family -- that will be a huge comfort to them as they deal with their loss.
Thanks for the words of wisdom too.
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07/20/2005 02:12:48 PM · #4 |
Yup, life is short - live every day to the fullest, take care of today and the future will take care of itself!
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 14:13:54.
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07/20/2005 03:11:09 PM · #5 |
Originally posted by neophyte:
Thanks Brad..Today I needed that. especially today. I too am suffering through a terrible loss that I can't bring myself to say more about. Cherish every day. |
Holler if ya need someone to talk to Dex. *hug* |
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07/20/2005 03:16:11 PM · #6 |
We all can go through life with emotional distance to people so
things like this don't hurt, but what good is being a hollow shell.
In December, 3 other customers passed away, again all people I
have developed more than a business relationship with.
I would far rather be hurt a little in life, than cold, impersonal and unaffected.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 15:24:48. |
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07/20/2005 03:17:42 PM · #7 |
I learnt just how short life is earlier this year when I was diagnosed with kidney cancer. In April I had it removed, along with a few others bits and pieces. After three months off work, I went back this week and am trying to get my strength and stamina back to normal.
On Tuesday I see the consultant to find out whether I'm clear for now, or if there are any secondary growths. During my recovery I haven't bothered much about photography, just getting back into it now. You have to live for each day, don't wait for tomorrow...it may not come.
Get out there, do all those things you want to do!
Steve |
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07/20/2005 03:18:46 PM · #8 |
I fully agree. It is like we are being stripped of what we hold dear. Whenever we lose a family member or a dear friend it appears that something in us also dies. The way of the world.
Hey Brad I think you are a gentleman and understand that your thoughts and feelings are fully appreciate it as we are all travelers with our own time clock ticking away. Do not feel guilty about enjoying the moment. Seize it!
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 19:52:51. |
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07/20/2005 03:32:30 PM · #9 |
Originally posted by graphicfunk:
I fully agree. It is like we are being stripped of what we hold dear. Whenever we lose a family member or a dear friend it appears that something in us also dies. The way of the world.
Hey Brad I think you are a gentleman and understand that your thoughts and feelings are fully appreciate it as we are all travelers with our oen time clock ticking away. Do not feel guilty about enjoying the moment. Seize it! |
Well said! Carpe diem! |
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07/20/2005 03:34:55 PM · #10 |
We are going through somewhat of a tough time right now!
My wife Penny and her brother's and sister are having to deal with their mother having Cancer. She is getting treatments for it and she now has officially lost all her hair and is not getting around like she use to.
We lost her Father a few years back and her mom has always been one tough lady :)
Penny and her Brother's and Sister are all having a tough time dealing with it. But I do not know many people that can be tough in a situation like this even "Men".
What is making it hard on Penny is that her Sister lives about an hour away and the two boys are very little help. So Mom is always calling on Penny for help and etc.
Penny is trying to be tough but hey what can you do when your Mother is so ill and it just tears you up.
I lost both my parents after we moved to Texas and I have a hard time dealing with that. Especially with them not seeing the boys when they were young.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 15:36:14.
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07/20/2005 03:42:01 PM · #11 |
Very true words.
Reason this whole thing came up, was a couple of touching
phone calls from a customer, who's husband is in cardiac
intensive care, and now recovering from a double bypass
and valve replacement operation.
Yesterday, she was so concerned about getting her car picked up
here and not taking up space. I assured her I would deliver
it back to her house if needed and not to give it a second
thought (more important things in life than a car!)
Her call to me this morning was to let me know her husband was
out of surgery, doing well, and never mentioned anything about
her car this time.
That made it personal, not business, and was very touching.
Moments in life that have meaning. |
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07/20/2005 04:47:01 PM · #12 |
Men and women of honor know what to do and when to do it. There are many of these people on this site..
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07/20/2005 05:07:16 PM · #13 |
at the moment my heart goes out to all affected by the horrific bike accident in germany. My thoughts are with their families and friends. One has died and the rest are seriously hurt. That is pretty much our womens riding team wiped out. Just devestating.
aussie riders- horrible story
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07/20/2005 05:19:26 PM · #14 |
Thanks Brad.
The most important thing in this world (to me) is the connections I have with family and friends and I try to prioritise that aspect of life as much as I can.
I also think it's important to work towards one's dreams every day. Whether it's a tiny step or a big one, just keep moving towards it.
Don't leave all your dreams till retirement - none of us know what is around the corner.
I'm not saying not to plan for the future at all but I am saying live life right now, every day, with those you love and doing the things you love doing.
Thanks Brad.
Also, strength to all fellow DPCers going through tough times right now.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 17:21:27.
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07/20/2005 05:25:17 PM · #15 |
Brad, I understand where you are coming from. I teach a class of Senior Citizens, and in the past 5 months, the class has gone from 9 rather healthy members to 4. The others have either been put in the nursing home or are being kept at home under doctor's orders. (Well, except for one fiesty little 70ish lady who has "quit school" and we saw her name in teh police report the other day, 'nuther story).
When people come into your life, you pick up pieces of them, and they pick up pieces of you. But, I agree with you, I would rather have these relationships and get hurt, than to never have them at all. |
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07/20/2005 06:35:12 PM · #16 |
What a beautiful touching thing Brad.... i discovered only 3 years ago, my husband who was only 35 at the time, how short life really is. He came home from work after nightshift one morning, and i could just sense something was really wrong ( him and i have always had this freakish 6th sense with each other, the night in question i had woken up with a REALLY sore arm ) , after several times of me asking him was he o.k, he finally admitted to 'something' happening to him the night before. To cut a REALLY long story short, every body had noticed he was looking worse and worse leading up to this moment over a few short weeks, his face was grey, he had lost a lot of weight, ( his not very big anyway ) and his moods had changed dramatically, he was now permanently cranky..lol.. if he had one or two beers, he ended up quite aggrresive and sometimes we would lose him from the 'party' ( wherever we seem to be ) i would find him back home, in bed and very sick, like he'd drunk a thousand beers or something. Back to the night in question, he told me he thinks he may of had symptoms of a heartattack at work, ( his dad had just recently passed from a heartattack ) he said his arm was really sore and had terrible pains in the chest.. mind you by this stage i am thinking WHY DIDN'T YOU COME HOME..!!... so that was it... off to the doctors there and then....after a 3 hour blood test... ( where you have a series of tests to determine whats wrong ) we were told to go home and wait for results, being a friday we knew we would have a LONG weekend ahead of us...
Well.. the weekend was hell, he looked worse after every few hours ( not joking, he was going down hill fast ) his lips were now peeling and white, his face was so sunken in he looked like a skeleton and he was down to about 67kgs...we had ouselves convinced it was cancer and a very aggresive one at that, we presumed he was dying and fast... so we talked and talked about everything, i don't think we slept the entire weekend incase this was the last weekend of our 'freedom' before tests were done and we lost him... it was very very scary stuff... i quickly went from a stay at home mum with only the three girls to worry about, to the one who every one depended on... ( not a role i like...)
Monday came and went with no word.. greg had to work again Monday night, just before he left the doctor rang and said he had greg's blood results and wanted to see us at the hospital straight away.. well we though our predictions were right. So off we went 'the beginning of the end of our healthy lifestyle'.... the doctor sat us both down and talk doctor jargon, the bascially said 'You have diabetes, your blood sugar level's were sky high and you should realistcally be dead'... we were OVER THE MOON...... and greg said, 'Is that all?' he said 'What do you mean is that all? it s a very serious illness' and i said ' but he won't die anytime soon will he?'.... and the doctor said 'no, if he looks after himself properly he will have a long healthy life'...WOW... we had just won life's lotto.. and the doctor couldn't understand why we were so excited about it... lol... so we told him what we had thought... he didn't laugh though.... and he also explained to us 'the heartattack' greg thought he was experiencing wasn't a heartattack, but a stroke, and couldn't work out how he had gotten through it without any damage or kept working, ( they didn't actually say he had one, but definately had some problems going on ) . Anyways.... since then i have nearly lost him three times.. pnemonia, hypos etc...... i had to give him a needle a coulple of times as he has passed out on me, one time he was outside working in the yard ( very hot 32 degree morning in summer , thats 90 or 100 for you guys') and i went looking for him as i couldn't hear him hammering anymore, and there he was flat on his back in the sun.... he had been passed out for , we think about , 2 hours.... we think he was actually on the verge of going into a coma, he said every know and then he could hear us talking but couldn't moove anything....the next morning his poor little eyelids were so burnt he could harldly blink....
I could go on and tell you guy's a million story's on some of his hypos, some very funny, ( not funny but the things his done are funny ) but i won't bore you all, i've probably already done that...
So the moral of the story was, we now know how precious life is, and love every day, i often wonder if that's the reason for me finding photography.. to 'capture' our lives, so we have something to look back on later on in life, ( i never picked up a camera before, only for kids birthdays ) we often remind each other on 'that' weekend expecially if we're have a bad day'....and it soon brings us back to the good things in life...our motto for life is now 'It ain't no dress rehersal, just do it'
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 18:38:07.
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07/20/2005 06:57:40 PM · #17 |
| Roadrunner - I was diagnosed with that kind of diabetes too when I was 16, the doctors also sent me home when they should have sent me to the hospital straight away as I could barely walk and had all the symptoms, all it takes is a simple fingerprick test. I too lost alot of weight, it was a scary experience. I am lucky though to not have many other things go wrong like bad hypos (cause I am always checking my sugar level lol). It was not a life altering experience (it affected my Mum more than me) but it did make me treasure the little things in life more and learn to appreciate them and it made me realise how important the people close to me are because they were all there for me when it happened. |
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07/20/2005 07:13:36 PM · #18 |
thanks mel... sorry to hear about yours too... are you on insulin?.. i used to wish in the early days that i had it rather than him, as we are so more intune with our bodies...and check more often than him, but he is weird with it... he can check himself and be fine with his levels, then 20 mins later be passed out on the floor..... they think it has something to do with his fast metabolism.. and he used to get warnings and feel he was getting low, but not anymore, it sometimes just hits out of the blue, that has really frightned him, so he is now so much more careful with it...he is also jsut as bad being high.. he gets really agro... i can tell now just by looking at him what his app. levels are ( high or low )..... i hate when he goes somewhere in the car on his own, really scary, and considering he has no idea how to use a mobile phone, or even want s too...
It's funny isn't it, noone in his family has it, and they are pretty sure what happen was he had a virus and for some reason it attacked his pancreas and not his lungs or stomach.. just unlucky i guess... just life...we often say we are glad it was one of us and not one of the kids... with all the experiences they are yet to go through, he say's his glad he got it at this age and not a younger person... at least at this age there 's no pressure on drinking alcohol and partying, like he had growing up in sydney, he'dve been dead by now for sure...
take care Mel..
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07/20/2005 07:35:44 PM · #19 |
Man I had been feeling like crap for years and years, and I dont know, I guess I sorta got used to it. Being a typical guy, I never went to the Doctor, even though I damn sure knew I needed to.
My G/F finally made me go when after one day I told her that morning I thought I was going to pass out on the way to work. I had felt that way several times, but very scary when you are driving
So I went and my blood sugar and blood pressure were through the roof. I was not on deaths door, but very sick. I was lucky enough to control the blood sugar through diet and exercise, but I will probably take blood pressure meds for the rest of my life.
But its just amazing how wonderful it is to actually feel like a normal healthy person. And I enjoy everyday so much more.
So, if your a guy, get your regular checkups. Dont wait 25 years between them like I did. |
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07/20/2005 08:24:48 PM · #20 |
Originally posted by Riggs:
Man I had been feeling like crap for years and years, and I dont know, I guess I sorta got used to it. Being a typical guy, I never went to the Doctor, even though I damn sure knew I needed to.
My G/F finally made me go when after one day I told her that morning I thought I was going to pass out on the way to work. I had felt that way several times, but very scary when you are driving
So I went and my blood sugar and blood pressure were through the roof. I was not on deaths door, but very sick. I was lucky enough to control the blood sugar through diet and exercise, but I will probably take blood pressure meds for the rest of my life .But its just amazing how wonderful it is to actually feel like a normal healthy person. And I enjoy everyday so much more.
So, if your a guy, get your regular checkups. Dont wait 25 years between them like I did. |
why do you guy's do that?... if my grandfather and father in law listened to their bodies like us woman do, they would still be alive today and enjoying their beautiful grandchildren..... my husband say's it's an ego thing..and he really is starting to listen to what his body is telling him now.. thank goodness... my dad had a mole he got on his leg checked immediately , luckily as they took out about a mandarin size of his calf muscle, it took twice to remove all of it.. thats how fast the melanoma was working.. his brother died three years later of cancer as well...
come on guy's we want you around forever with us .. 'For the big picture'.... please help us live a happy healthy lifestyle with you and go and see a doctor the minute something is wrong....
.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 20:28:08.
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07/20/2005 09:08:03 PM · #21 |
Personal reflection on this:
Guys have a "Superman, nothing can harm me" attitude.
Almost 5 years ago, I am glad I didn't have that attitude.
The morning after Thanksgiving, I felt kinda' stiff, ached a bit in
my arm/back and at times, and would completely go away. No problem - has
to be a pulled muscle or pinched nerve. The ache would come & go, and
as I sat at the traffic light 1/2 mile from the shop, I suddenly felt it
coming on again, but now with a sweat breaking out, and my fingers got cold.
Instead of turning right and ignoring it, I turned left and went to the
emergency room and presented the symptoms. As suspected, I was
experiencing a heart attack. The enzyms were present in my blood, and
was later to find out that the Circumflex Artery wasn't staying open.
2 stents later....
Didn't hurt to think about things either.
Rather than being one of the "take a pill for everything" kinds like
they wanted me to be, I just kept a good eye on my diet, take one asprin
a day and watching my diet. 70/110 blood pressure, Cholesterol total
under 180, only weigh 5lbs more than I did in 1973.
Eating more things like what I had for dinner last night - salad
w/spinach leaves, tuna mixed in, oil & balsamic vinegar goes a long way
- shame to have to cut back on the Nachos though.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 21:15:03. |
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07/20/2005 09:08:54 PM · #22 |
life is short. pass the beer nuts.
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07/20/2005 09:13:47 PM · #23 |
WOW brad.. thank goodness you turned left... otherwise you may not be here...
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07/20/2005 09:20:44 PM · #24 |
EXACTLY what the Heart Surgeon said.
Had I ignored it, I would have probably keeled over in the shop that morning and it
would have been many hours until anyone noticed as I was here alone that day.
Message edited by author 2005-07-20 21:21:43. |
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12/17/2005 03:15:21 AM · #25 |
I'm going to revive this thread....
I've been gone from DPC for a couple of months, just came back yesterday actually and was going sporadically through old threads to try and catch up with what has been going on.
After clearing my eyes with handfuls of kleenex... Brad, you started this thread originally, on the day that they took my Mom in for surgery. Hence, why I've been gone.
Her front artery was 90% blocked and her right artery was 100% blocked, but they said that it had started to try and make channels around the blockage. She is doing better.. but I still fear for her, since she fights me every step of the way in changing things.
See, my dad died 5 years ago, made it through with flying colors from a triple by-pass. We got to the hospital on the day he was to come home, everything was great. Went down stairs to get truck from garage and by time got back up stairs... he uhm.... well.. they were working on him. We never did get exact answer, we did not want autopsy, the surgeon who came out to us to tell us that he didn't make it, honest... had tears in eyes. He was the same surgeon that did the triple and was so pleased with the progress that my dad had made. They think it was a blood clot that he threw and it went to his lungs.
So, when my mom kept having problems, I kept after her to get checked. She did, sort of... her doctor told her it was just depression and being tired. I kept pushing though....
I knew the symptoms for women were a little different than men.
So...... your post has hit me hard.. in a good way. Bringing back memories of my dad (which is always good, sad, but good) and reminds me of why I fight so hard with my mom for her to make the changes that she needs to.
Thanks....
-Christine |
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