morning temperby
xantangummiComment by Dr.Confuser: Greetings from the Critique Club: I have been assigned your photo to critique and here are my thoughts:
Personal Reaction: To be honest, I didn’t like the photo that much. There were many in the challenge along the same lines, “kill the alarm clock.” And this was not among the best executions of the idea. But I want to look past my personal reaction.
Composition: The composition was interesting. I liked the corner of the bed for context. I liked the dynamic triangle (hammer head, clock, and the handle of the hammer). It gives the photo an active (rather than passive) feel. I might have trimmed a bit off the top, but that’s personal taste on my part. And I like duotone treatment. It makes me believe it’s morning … early morning in fact.
Technicals: I am not sure how much of the resulting image originated in the camera and how much resulted from post processing. There are some issues from my perspective: Focus is off a bit with nothing in really sharp focus; the lighting is such that most details are lost in the blacks or blown with the whites. Without any commentary from you I can’t tell if this is intentional, or an oversight. I wear glasses, and when I wake up without them, everything is a bit blurry and ill defined, especially if I awake before dawn. So if this was your intention, you nailed it! Well done! If not intentional, it’ll be something to work on next time.
Conclusions: In your comments, you indicate “great idea but poorly executed.” I am interested in your self diagnosis … what was poorly executed, from your perspective? In the end, I think it scored lower than you might have hoped because it became cliché during the challenge and because the gritty technicals don’t have much of a mass appeal. I wouldn’t necessarily change it because voters weren’t wowed by it, but if you’re looking for higher scores, working on the lighting and focus may help.
I took a look at your portfolio. You have some stunningly good photos there. I especially like the photos titled: unborn, Zen frames, and quicksilver. Good luck in future challenges.
As always, this is my personal opinion. Feel free to PM me if you’d like further dialog.
Photographer found comment helpful.