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Showing posts 151 - 175 of 249, (reverse)
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06/27/2013 04:15:01 PM · #151
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

I guess God has found me, but not you. Whatchagonnado?


I didn't know you were a Presbyterian.
06/27/2013 04:25:22 PM · #152
Originally posted by posthumous:

Originally posted by DrAchoo:

I guess God has found me, but not you. Whatchagonnado?


I didn't know you were a Presbyterian.


Actually I attended a PCA church in Virginia for four years. ;)
06/27/2013 04:30:40 PM · #153
Originally posted by posthumous:

Originally posted by DrAchoo:

I guess God has found me, but not you. Whatchagonnado?


I didn't know you were a Presbyterian.


Rimshot worthy.

Reminds me of the bumper sticker "Jesus loves you, everybody else thinks your an asshole."
06/27/2013 04:40:36 PM · #154
Originally posted by blindjustice:

Reminds me of the bumper sticker "Jesus loves you, everybody else thinks your an asshole."

I remember one which went "Lord, Protect Me From Your Followers" and one which goes "Born Right The First Time" ...
06/27/2013 04:48:45 PM · #155
I rather like this one.
06/27/2013 04:54:17 PM · #156
You guys are cute when you wave your pitchforks around. :)
06/27/2013 04:56:58 PM · #157
Originally posted by Judith Polakoff:

This is very funny. :-)

Except that the punchline misrepresents (as is usual) Onan's sin ...

Originally posted by scalvert:

I rather like this one.

... and that's a pretty outdated picture of electron orbits/shells ... :-(

Originally posted by DrAchoo:

You guys are cute ...

Man, a couple of SCOTUS decisions and suddenly you're being propositioned on every street corner ... :-)

Message edited by author 2013-06-27 17:01:21.
06/27/2013 05:07:52 PM · #158
The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)
06/27/2013 05:25:25 PM · #159
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)


You are clever, But its not the same.
06/27/2013 05:32:21 PM · #160
Originally posted by blindjustice:

Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)


You are clever, But its not the same.


Since I'm the object of the jokes, I think I get to make that call. Honestly, the behavior is shameful. If I was standing in front of you guys would you feel as comfortable calling me an asshole (or my friends)? Is it only the virtual world that allows such behavior? I find it uncouth, disrespectful and denigrating. You can laugh it off, but let's call it what it is.
06/27/2013 05:50:18 PM · #161
Originally posted by GeneralE:


Originally posted by DrAchoo:

You guys are cute ...

Man, a couple of SCOTUS decisions and suddenly you're being propositioned on every street corner ... :-)


I really did LOL on that one.
06/27/2013 05:51:32 PM · #162
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)


Aww. Sorry man, didn't mean to make you feel singled out.

I don't see a darn bit of difference between Jews, Muslims, Zoroastrians, Christians, Hindus, or any other superstitious group of folks. You're all equally silly in my mind. :)
06/27/2013 05:57:49 PM · #163
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

Originally posted by blindjustice:

Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)


You are clever, But its not the same.


Since I'm the object of the jokes, I think I get to make that call. Honestly, the behavior is shameful. If I was standing in front of you guys would you feel as comfortable calling me an asshole (or my friends)? Is it only the virtual world that allows such behavior? I find it uncouth, disrespectful and denigrating. You can laugh it off, but let's call it what it is.


To be VERY clear, I've not called you an asshole, nor will I, here or in person.

I will GLADLY tell you just what I think of your insistence that god is real, and that you have factual knowledge of him and heaven/hell. In fact, I have had this conversation with MANY people in real life, and I piss them off too, hell sometimes I even really do laugh and point, in a very uncouth and disrespectful manner. It is my intention to denigrate your beliefs, or at least the belief that you have the ability to claim real knowledge. The beliefs bit is actually fine by me, my hackles only raise when you try to claim it as fact.

I however, find you, Jason, to be a delightful person, and would never suggest otherwise.

Message edited by author 2013-06-27 17:59:23.
06/27/2013 06:03:50 PM · #164
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)

Any jokes, ethnic or otherwise, can be funny or offensive depending on context and the attitudes of both the teller and the respondent. Jews can be as funny, rude, selfish, stupid, or ignorant as anyone else. To almost-quote Mel Brooks, when I get a paper cut, that's tragedy, when you fall in a hole and break your leg, that's comedy.
=============
Try this one at work:

How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?

<voce pathetique>
"Never mind, I'll just sit here in the dark."
=============
Or one of my other favorites, which should skewer followers of both the Old and New Testaments:

Every day the old man said a prayer, "Please God, let me win the lottery."

Day after day, his wishes grew more and more plaintive, "Dear God, I've been a good man please let me win the lottery."

This continued on and on and on in an ever-escalating cascade of entreaties until finally, one day the clouds parted and a majestic voice boomed forth: "Alright already! But listen, you gotta help me out at least buy a ticket."

Message edited by author 2013-06-27 18:06:23.
06/27/2013 06:26:10 PM · #165
Originally posted by Cory:

Originally posted by GeneralE:


Originally posted by DrAchoo:

You guys are cute ...

Man, a couple of SCOTUS decisions and suddenly you're being propositioned on every street corner ... :-)


I really did LOL on that one.


I actually thought that one was witty too.
06/27/2013 06:29:19 PM · #166
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

I actually thought that one was witty too.

Thanks, I thought it was at least half-witty myself ... did I mention that my mom was a long-time actress and successful teacher of improvisational acting/comedy? ;-)
06/27/2013 09:56:03 PM · #167
I don't know about the rest of these assholes but I was making a joke about predestination.
06/27/2013 10:13:29 PM · #168
So..this is the kind of humor that's allowed? Yeah i got yer voice pathetique right here.

[quote=GeneralE]
Originally posted by DrAchoo:

The other day we were around the watercooler and someone started telling some jew jokes. Man! We laughed and laughed! I had tears by the end.

(OK, it didn't really happen, but I'm trying my best to fit in here.)

Any jokes, ethnic or otherwise, can be funny or offensive depending on context and the attitudes of both the teller and the respondent. Jews can be as funny, rude, selfish, stupid, or ignorant as anyone else. To almost-quote Mel Brooks, when I get a paper cut, that's tragedy, when you fall in a hole and break your leg, that's comedy.
=============
Try this one at work:

How many Jewish mothers does it take to change a light bulb?

<voce pathetique>
"Never mind, I'll just sit here in the dark."
=============
Or one of my other favorites, which should skewer followers of both the Old and New Testaments:

Every day the old man said a prayer, "Please God, let me win the lottery."

Day after day, his wishes grew more and more plaintive, "Dear God, I've been a good man please let me win the lottery."

This continued on and on and on in an ever-escalating cascade of entreaties until finally, one day the clouds parted and a majestic voice boomed forth: "Alright already! But listen, you gotta help me out at least buy a ticket." [/quote]
06/28/2013 07:16:12 PM · #169
Only vaguely on-topic, but regarding scientists' expectations of what "space" is like outside the envelope of the solar system, look what's happening with Voyager...
06/29/2013 07:09:16 AM · #170
Originally posted by Kelli:

Originally posted by Cory:

Originally posted by Kelli:

Since I'll be clinically dead for a bit on Monday, I'll let you know what I find.


Rather nicely macabre sense of humor there! I love it.

Hope all goes well for you, looking forward to your report. ;)


Thanks!

;P


So, I'll take a few minutes and jump back in here. I'm having a little trouble typing as it seems an almost permanent numbness has taken over the fingers of my right hand. It might go away eventually, or it might not. A side effect of the surgery.

I really did expect to see something here. I'm a bit disappointed to report that, no, nothing happened. I died for a short time on Monday and did not encounter any glowing white lights nor any much loved people from my past telling me one thing or another. I did not expect to see this from a religious pov, but rather a scientific (why does everyone claim this same experience?) type experiement. A failed experiment I guess. I can understand fully the reasons why people turn to religion. It's so much more comforting in the situation of looking at death to think, "well, it's not the end if the worst happens". And the worst of it is, I think believing that way truly is a dangerous way to look at things. If I believed that it didn't matter if I died because I'd be with those I've loved and lost I might have refused the surgery. I can't tell you the number of people that told me they were praying for me. I can easily accept that, because in my mind it's simply a way of saying "I'm with you or I'll be there for you". But it could also be the power of positive thinking.
06/29/2013 11:26:32 AM · #171
Originally posted by Kelli:

Originally posted by Kelli:

Originally posted by Cory:

Originally posted by Kelli:

Since I'll be clinically dead for a bit on Monday, I'll let you know what I find.


Rather nicely macabre sense of humor there! I love it.

Hope all goes well for you, looking forward to your report. ;)


Thanks!

;P


So, I'll take a few minutes and jump back in here. I'm having a little trouble typing as it seems an almost permanent numbness has taken over the fingers of my right hand. It might go away eventually, or it might not. A side effect of the surgery.

I really did expect to see something here. I'm a bit disappointed to report that, no, nothing happened. I died for a short time on Monday and did not encounter any glowing white lights nor any much loved people from my past telling me one thing or another. I did not expect to see this from a religious pov, but rather a scientific (why does everyone claim this same experience?) type experiement. A failed experiment I guess. I can understand fully the reasons why people turn to religion. It's so much more comforting in the situation of looking at death to think, "well, it's not the end if the worst happens". And the worst of it is, I think believing that way truly is a dangerous way to look at things. If I believed that it didn't matter if I died because I'd be with those I've loved and lost I might have refused the surgery. I can't tell you the number of people that told me they were praying for me. I can easily accept that, because in my mind it's simply a way of saying "I'm with you or I'll be there for you". But it could also be the power of positive thinking.


And with that post you just got added to my favorite photographers. Thank you so very much for reporting back.

Glad you're back with us, and I know just how fricken annoying a numb arm/hand is. Fortunately mine just comes and goes as it pleases.

Message edited by author 2013-06-29 11:28:26.
06/29/2013 11:31:19 AM · #172
Glad you pulled through Kelli! Sorry you didn't hear the angels on your brief voyage.
06/29/2013 12:56:02 PM · #173
Over the years the surgeon had grown increasingly interested in what his patients experienced during their brief transitions from life to death and back to life again; he'd read some interesting accounts, but never heard one first-hand. He resolved to ask his next patient describe the experience.

"It was incredible, I could feel nothing, and I was surrounded by this blindingly bright light. Finally just before the end, the last thing I can remember is a kindly face hovering over me."

"Really?" the doctor asked excitedly, "could you make it out, see what it looked like?"

"Sure doc, it was you."

Message edited by author 2013-06-29 20:59:25.
06/29/2013 08:58:31 PM · #174
Originally posted by Bear_Music:

Only vaguely on-topic, but regarding scientists' expectations of what "space" is like outside the envelope of the solar system, look what's happening with Voyager...

Here is NASA's article on the latest. When people get to dissing NASA I like to remind them that these spacecraft were launched 36 years ago (pretty much before modern computers/microprocessors), and they are sending that data back with a transmitter putting out a whopping 20 watts or so.
07/03/2013 10:09:37 AM · #175
Instead of pondering how the universe came to be, let's instead look at the other end of the spectrum; how it will all end.

In a billion or so years, the temperature on Earth will be so high that most plants and animals will be dead. All that will be left is a few microbes deep underground near the last remaining water. A few million years after that, they'll be gone too and Earth will be a dead rock orbiting the Sun.

Lets say that humankind hasn't already obliterated itself by this point, we've evolved and developed technologies that allow us to continue to exist, either on our soon-to-be-consumed-by-a-red-dwarf planet, or somewhere else in our solar system or nearby star system.

Now project forward another few billion years. Most stars have died, the last remaining sources of energy in the universe are slowly depleting. We'll either be swallowed up by the big crunch, or dissipate into nothingness in a cold death. We know something like this will eventually happen.

And in all of this, a benevolent God is mopping up the last remaining human souls from their scattered hiding places throughout the universe to live with him in eternity in some 'other' place away from all the crazy quantum goings on.

For starters, if God had a hand in creating the Universe, why is he not under consideration for its final destruction? - Is it because it's easier for science to come up with the answers about 'the end' versus 'the beginning' leaving no gap for God to fill?

And back to my favorite subject. What's he going to do with these billions of souls who made it to Heaven? Was that really the purpose of his trillion-year long Universe experiment, to have a collection of human souls handy?

Why go to all that trouble? Why not just create a collection of souls from scratch to start with instead of all the complexities of creating a (mostly empty) universe, physics, animals, planets, life, DNA, Jesus, sin, and all that malarky? - Or was his creation simply a way of filtering the 'good souls' from the 'bad souls' for his collection?

Or is it simpler than that? i.e. Mankind will one day be extinct. Earth will eventually burn up, and The Universe (current version) will cease to exist. The End.
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