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Showing posts 151 - 175 of 1529, (reverse)
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08/23/2004 11:48:16 PM · #151
Originally posted by weaverc:

Originally posted by skiprow:

picque moi


pique_moi
08/23/2004 11:48:51 PM · #152
If you're going to make fun of the annoying guy at least spell his name right!
08/23/2004 11:51:35 PM · #153
My monkey is on the loose, prowling the streets, looking in people's windows and usually scaring the bejeezus out of them. I don't know what to do. He's a very bad monkey, he just won't come when called. I would normally just wait until he got hungry and came home, but when he left he took a knapsack full of Twinkies and HoHos. That's enough to keep him going for at least a week or more if the old lady down the street starts feeding him again like she did last summer. I can't call the police or animal control, they'd either kill him or put him in a zoo, which would do the same thing only much slower. So, if you see a monkey in your window, please be understanding, but no matter how much he begs, please don't feed him.

Thanks
08/23/2004 11:52:31 PM · #154
There was this haunted house on the outskirts of the town which was avoided by all the townfolk - the ghost which `lived' there was feared by all.

However, an enterprising journalist decided to get the scoop of the day by photographing the fearsome phantom. When he entered the house, armed with only his camera, the ghost descended upon him, clanking chains et al. He told the ghost "I mean no harm - I just want your photograph". The ghost was quite happy at this chance to make the headlines - he posed for a number of ghostly shots.

The happy journalist rushed back to his dark room, and began developing the photos. Unfortunately, they turned out to be black and underexposed.

So what's the moral of the story?

The spirit was willing but the flash was weak.
08/23/2004 11:54:14 PM · #155
The Smiths had no children and decided to use a proxy father to start their family. On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr.Smith kissed his wife and said, "I'm off. The man should be here soon."

Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby photographer rang the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. "Good morning madam. You don't know me but I've come to...."

"Oh, no need to explain. I've been expecting you," Mrs. Smith cut in.

"Really?" the photographer asked. "Well, good! I've made a specialty of babies."

"That's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and have a seat. Just where do we start?" asked Mrs. Smith, blushing.

"Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on the couch and perhaps a couple on the bed. Sometimes the living room floor is fun too; you can really spread out."

"Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work for Harry and me."

"Well, madam, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But if we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven angles, I'm sure you'll be pleased with the results."

"I hope we can get this over with quickly," gasped Mrs. Smith.

"Madam, in my line of work, a man must take his time. I'd love to be in and out in five minutes, but you'd be disappointed with that, I'm sure."

"Don't I know!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed.

The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio of his baby pictures. "This was done on the top of a bus in downtown London."

"Oh my god!!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, tugging at her handkerchief.

"And these twins turned out exceptionally well when you consider their mother was so difficult to work with." The photographer handed Mrs. Smith the picture.

"She was difficult ?" asked Mrs. Smith.

"Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to Hyde Park to get the job done right. People were crowding around four and five deep, pushing to get a good look."

"Four and five deep?" asked Mrs. Smith, eyes widened in amazement.

"Yes", the photographer said. "And for more than three hours too. The mother was constantly squealing and yelling. I could hardly concentrate. Then darkness approached and I began to rush my shots. Finally, when the squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just packed it all in."

Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "You mean they actually chewed on your, eh......equipment?"

"That's right. Well madam, if you're ready, I'll set up my tripod so that we can get to work."

"Tripod??", Mrs. Smith looked extremely worried now.

"Oh yes, I have to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's much too big for me to hold while I'm getting ready for action. Madam? Madam?..... Good Lord, she's fainted!!"
08/23/2004 11:58:02 PM · #156
Do you have what it takes?
08/24/2004 12:14:08 AM · #157


WARNING CONTAINS POLITICAL OPINIONS. DO NOT OPEN IF YOU CAN'T DEAL. JUST WATCH AND LAUGH

WARNING THIS ALSO CONTAINS A POLITICAL VIEW.
08/24/2004 12:19:56 AM · #158
Oh my God Laurie!!! that was f*****g HILARIOUS.

thank -you.

and oh,,,,by the way.......BBBBUUUUUUUMMMMMMMMPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!
08/24/2004 12:46:51 AM · #159
Here's why
> >
> >                        According to today's regulators
> >                         and bureaucrats, those of us
> >                          who were kids in the 40's,
> >                           50's, 60's, or  70's probably
> >                           shouldn't have survived.
> >
> >                          Our baby cribs were covered
> >                                with bright colored
> >
> >                                 lead-based paint.
> >
> >
> >                           We had no childproof lids
> >                          on medicine bottles, doors
> >                         or cabinets, ... and when we
> >                     rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
> >
> >                          (Not to mention the risks
> >                             we took hitchhiking.)
> >
> >                          As children, we would ride
> >                           in cars with no seatbelts
> >                                 or air bags.
> >
> >                        Riding in the back of a pickup
> >                            truck on a warm day was
> >                            always a special treat.
> >
> >                       We drank water from the garden
> >                          hose and not from a bottle.
> >
> >
> >                                   Horrors!
> >
> >                          We ate cupcakes, bread and
> >                          butter, and drank soda pop
> >                         with sugar in it, but we were
> >                           never overweight because
> >                       we were always outside playing
> >
> >
> >                           We shared one soft drink
> >                          with four friends, from one
> >                          bottle, and no one actually
> >                                died from this.
> >
> >                         We would spend hours building
> >                          our go-carts out of scraps
> >                         and then rode down the hill,
> >                          only to find out we forgot
> >                                  the brakes.
> >
> >                         After running into the bushes
> >                          a few times, we learned to
> >                              solve the problem.
> >
> >                          We would leave home in the
> >                           morning and play all day,
> >                            as long as we were back
> >                            when the street lights
> >                                   came on.
> >
> >                              No one was able to
> >                               reach us all day.
> >
> >                          ( NO CELL PHONES!!!!! )
> >
> >                                 Unthinkable!
> >                         We did not have Play-stations,
> >                           Nintendo 64, X-Boxes, no
> >                           video games at all, no 99
> >                           channels on cable, video
> >                             tape movies, surround
> >                         sound, personal cell phones,
> >                        personal computers, or Internet
> >                                  chat rooms.
> >
> >                                We had friends!
> >
> >                           We went outside and found
> >                                     them.
> >
> >                           We played dodge ball, and
> >                           sometimes, the ball would
> >                                 really hurt.
> >
> >                           We fell out of trees, got
> >                            cut and broke bones and
> >                           teeth, and there were no
> >                        lawsuits from these accidents.
> >
> >                             They were accidents.
> >
> >                          No one was to blame but us.
> >                              Remember accidents?
> >
> >                           We had fights and punched
> >                       each other and got black and blue
> >                           and learned to get over it.
> >
> >
> >                             We made up games with
> >                          sticks and tennis balls and
> >                          ate worms, and although we
> >                          were told it would happen,
> >                         we did not put out very many
> >                            eyes, nor did the worms
> >                              live inside us forever.
> >
> >                          We rode bikes or walked to
> >                          a friend's home and knocked
> >                           on the door, or rang the
> >                          bell or just walked in and
> >                                talked to them.
> >
> >                           Little League had tryouts
> >
> >                        and not everyone made the team.
> >                          Those who didn't had to learn
> >                           to deal with disappointment.
> >
> >                            Some students weren't as
> >                           smart as others, so they
> >                            failed a grade and were
> >                            held back to repeat the
> >                                  same grade.
> >
> >                                   Horrors!
> >
> >                            Tests were not adjusted
> >                                for any reason.
> >
> >                           Our actions were our own.
> >
> >                          Consequences were expected.
> >
> >                         The idea of a parent bailing
> >                           us out if we broke a law
> >                                was unheard of.
> >
> >                              They actually sided
> >                                 with the law.
> >
> >                                 Imagine that!
> >
> >                         This generation has produced
> >                         some of the best risk-takers
> >                            and problem solvers and
> >                               inventors, ever.
> >
> >                            The past 50 years have
> >                             been an explosion of
> >                              innovation and new
> >                                       ideas.
> >
> >                           We had freedom, failure,
> >                          success and responsibility,
> >                          and we learned how to deal
> >                                   with it all.
> >
> >                            And you're one of them!
> >
> >                               Congratulations!
> >
> >                           Please pass this on to others
> >                         who have had the luck to grow
> >                          up as kids, before lawyers
> >                         and government regulated our
> >                           lives, for our own good !!!!!
08/24/2004 12:59:35 AM · #160
"help this thread make it through the night...."
08/24/2004 01:03:34 AM · #161
the worms are eating my brain
08/24/2004 01:12:36 AM · #162
did my part
08/24/2004 01:21:11 AM · #163
I'm moving onto campus tomorrow...eek...
08/24/2004 01:21:29 AM · #164
I refuse to take part in this thread

...

oops
08/24/2004 01:23:52 AM · #165
Im tired of processing weddings!!!!!
08/24/2004 01:28:51 AM · #166
Originally posted by grigrigirl:

Im tired of processing weddings!!!!!


actually, that's what I'm doing at the moment too, wasn't there as a photographer but took a bunch of snapshots anyway. Took almost 2 hours just to run them through neat image (low light + iso1600 + long focal lengths - tripod - SB800 cuz I don't have one = noise + camera shake = P
08/24/2004 01:30:55 AM · #167
Originally posted by Maverick:

Originally posted by grigrigirl:

Im tired of processing weddings!!!!!


actually, that's what I'm doing at the moment too, wasn't there as a photographer but took a bunch of snapshots anyway. Took almost 2 hours just to run them through neat image (low light + iso1600 + long focal lengths - tripod - SB800 cuz I don't have one = noise + camera shake = P


oh..the joys

all i ever do is process...process...process...

but i guess its better than putting my hands in peoples mouths all day.
08/24/2004 01:33:05 AM · #168
since this is basically a rant i'll post here:

woohoo, just sold my first print = D
08/24/2004 01:44:43 AM · #169
YAY for you!
08/24/2004 03:18:10 AM · #170
I just read this from the beginning to the end, & I think some people are getting way off topic here!!!!!!!
08/24/2004 03:24:40 AM · #171
Originally posted by weaverc:

Originally posted by skiprow:

picque moi


Ditto!
08/24/2004 04:26:20 AM · #172
Still a few pages to go -

Show us your worst challenge shot..

Don't know what i was thinking with this crap..

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08/24/2004 04:41:11 AM · #173
Originally posted by jonpink:

Still a few pages to go -

Show us your worst challenge shot..

Don't know what i was thinking with this crap..


I have quite a few to choose from
But I think theese two tops it
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' . substr('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_challenge/117/thumb/28807.jpg', strrpos('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_challenge/117/thumb/28807.jpg', '/') + 1) . '
08/24/2004 05:39:34 AM · #174
' . substr('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_portfolio/18219/thumb/99556.jpg', strrpos('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_portfolio/18219/thumb/99556.jpg', '/') + 1) . '
08/24/2004 05:39:38 AM · #175
Worst challenge shot.... 6" guitar.

' . substr('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_challenge/219/thumb/78090.jpg', strrpos('//images.dpchallenge.com/images_challenge/219/thumb/78090.jpg', '/') + 1) . '

What was I thinking :D
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