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07/24/2007 06:42:19 PM · #26 |
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
Originally posted by frisca:
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
*ouch* |
*BIG HUG* I highly doubt the OP was directed at you. You are not the first nor will you be the last to cry on the shoulder of DPC, and your friends here will always be here for you. Please don't take this general discussion as an attack on you or your recent misfortune. |
I disagree - it seems very obvious to me. |
Mike, as I said in my original post, this is not a personal attack against anyone it's just that your thread is very fresh in my mind still.
June
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07/24/2007 06:42:48 PM · #27 |
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
Originally posted by frisca:
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
*ouch* |
*BIG HUG* I highly doubt the OP was directed at you. You are not the first nor will you be the last to cry on the shoulder of DPC, and your friends here will always be here for you. Please don't take this general discussion as an attack on you or your recent misfortune. |
I disagree - it seems very obvious to me. |
I agree with Mike, the OP was directed at him and his recent misfortunes, I for one feel that DPC has room for BOTH photographic discussions and a little personal support. I have often gained insight from the kind folks here who give so much of themselves. |
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07/24/2007 06:47:01 PM · #28 |
Originally posted by BAMartin:
I agree with Mike, the OP was directed at him and his recent misfortunes, I for one feel that DPC has room for BOTH photographic discussions and a little personal support. I have often gained insight from the kind folks here who give so much of themselves. |
I'm pretty sure Chiqui didn't mean to single anyone out.
In any event, sometimes some of the personal support is a bit too, well, personal. |
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07/24/2007 06:49:32 PM · #29 |
 just do this, you don't need to open every thread, and if its more personal than you want, you don't have to read it. |
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07/24/2007 07:01:36 PM · #30 |
I'd like to point out that "ignore" only works if you're looking at the threads from your home page. It does not work in community view. I don't read the threads from the front page because I hate having to scroll down to get to them and I also like to see who the original poster is...a column which is missing from the home page view.
I do not enjoy seeing more personal discussions than photography discussions and would like a more reasonable way to deal with them.
I would like to see at least 2 things happen:
1. a "Personal" forum created
2. "ignored" threads marked in the community view similar to the way that "watched threads are marked. |
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07/24/2007 07:10:51 PM · #31 |
I did ask the SC to lock my thread but they could not because it did not breach any of the rules, i.e. there were no personal attacks etc.
The OP cannot request a thread to be locked just because they want it to. Well I knew that it would get on some peoples nerves and annoy the Sh*t out of some people.
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07/24/2007 07:17:53 PM · #32 |
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
Well I knew that it would get on some peoples nerves and annoy the Sh*t out of some people. |
Just gained points in my book :-)
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07/24/2007 07:18:36 PM · #33 |
Originally posted by fotomann_forever:
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
Well I knew that it would get on some peoples nerves and annoy the Sh*t out of some people. |
Just gained points in my book :-) |
;-)
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07/24/2007 07:22:52 PM · #34 |
I think I’m one of your culprits. I’ve probably said many things that are too personal or unflattering, but I’ve also made some very nice personal connections because of the very threads you are talking about. I agree they have their place, but I don’t see the point of trying to eliminate them.
Just out of curiosity. Where would you draw the line concerning the following types of posts?:
“I don't know what men thinkg about it but I'll give you my perspective. I shave my legs, armits, etc. Sometimes I forget to shave my legs (thankfully I am not hairy) and that doesn't bother me much but I hate armit hair. IMO, it makes my armpits smell stronger, maybe cause sweat gets trapped on the hairs, who knows. However, I also realize this is much more of a cultural thing. We were brought up being told women should look a certain way and do certain things and other people in other parts of the world weren't. I currently live in Italy and it's not uncommon to see women with unshaven legs and armpits and no one thinks much of it. We (americans) wear short all the time but if we were them here then we become the center of attention.....and perhaps criticism because women here, and men for that matter, do not wear shorts. That just goes to show ‘to each their own’. Some practices that are common and even expected in some regions of the world are totally out of place in others.”
“You Know You Grew Up In The 80's or Early 90's If:
>
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>1. You've ever ended a sentence with the word "SIKE"
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>2. You watched the Pound Puppies.
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>3. You can sing the rap to the "Fresh Prince of Belaire" and you can do the
>"Carlton".
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>4. Girls wore biker shorts under their skirts and felt stylishly sexy. “
etc…
“I have a crush on Catherine Zeta-Jones. I am not a lesbian but this is the woman I'd cross the line for. Translation, I'll remain straight my entire life :P”
Edit: THESE POSTS ARE NOT MINE.
Message edited by author 2007-07-24 19:48:05. |
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07/24/2007 07:43:04 PM · #35 |
I guess one thing is is that you don't have to read the thread that are titled in a personal way. You can ignore them.
I'd have to say, in this DPC community, there's alot of love and friendship that goes on here. It is a community and some of us care about what happens to the other. For some, it might be the only outreach of help they can get or have. Yes, photography is a major part of some of our lives, but we are human and humans need communication. Sometimes, we need a shoulder to cry on or just a friend to listen and get advice from. I'm sorry that you feel that its such a burden on the site but I think it makes the community stronger. Its nice to see that people care about what happens to others associated with this site. I know I have gained several good friends from being a member here and we talk about things other than photography. If you remember not too long ago, this community banned together to fine someone who went missing. And thank God we had this vehicle of communication to help find him. Just remember that, we are here for each other.
Peace, g
ps...ROX ROX...I do know the rap to the Fresh Prince of Belair and I can do the Carlton!! Kind of a guilty pleasure of mine..lol!
Message edited by author 2007-07-24 20:51:34.
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07/24/2007 08:52:09 PM · #36 |
June, I think you're missing the point of an online community. DPChallenge has 25 forums (if you're a member) and 23 of those are absolutely specific to photography. This is one of the most focused websites and message boards that I've come across. Everyone is here first and foremost for photography, but people that belong to any kind of community for any appreciable time naturally form friendships, even if they're virtual. Because of that, those people generally will want to discuss more than just one focused topic all the time. So the admins provide the General Discussion forum to allow the members of this website, who have come to know and respect and trust each other, a place to talk about whatever is on their minds and keep such discussions out of the photography-specific forums. Maybe it would be better named "Off Topic". In any case, such a forum is also necessary from a business perspective in order to keep members here on the DPChallenge website creating traffic, rather than leaving for another site whenever they had a non-photography issue to discuss.
That said, I see a lot of bleed over in both directions. I see photography-related threads in General Discussion, which is technically okay but less appropriate than putting them in one of the photography-related forums. I also see borderline off-topic threads in photography forums that should have been created in General Discussion. The moderators can move them, but sometimes it's not worth all the effort (I'm a moderator on a Nissan automotive message board which, by the way, has an off-topic section!).
I guess a lot of this stems from your belief that the General Discussion forum is for "general photography" issues, but as has been pointed out, there are other forums for that, and General Discussion (from everything I can tell) is meant to be for anything else besides photography. So if members from this community want or need to seek personal advice and support, and do it in the appropriate forum, then more power to them and you are free to use the ignore feature or simply not read those threads.
- Mike |
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07/24/2007 09:58:31 PM · #37 |
Any time you have a good forum, you're going to have a community of followers. That community is going to have people who don't always have peachy lives. When it seems like you have no one else to talk to, people will turn to their online community for comfort.
Many people communicate better in text than in words. I among many other people spend entirely too much time reading these forums. Even though I don't know many people here, I know that if I had a problem I could come here for advice and comforting.
Believe me I have enough problems of my own, so I agree that if the same person keeps posting their seemingly minor problems it does get annoying, but that's when I just ignore the thread. I feel guilty for doing it, but I've realized that they aren't necessarily reaching out to me, but reaching out to anyone. I'm not always going to be that someone, but in a community of this size there will always be someone there to comfort them. What is not a problem to me might seem like the end of the world to someone else.
We all need the ability to reach out. If not for the community's sake, for the sake that we're all human. To me the wedding, baby, and other announcements are generally the ones I don't pay much attention to. When I read that someone's wife left them after nearly 30 years or that a child got the crap kicked out of him, I care. Someone is hurting and someone needs another person to be there for them even if it is a photography forum. I may not always respond, but I always read the threads and make sure someone is there for them.
I think for the most part there's only a couple whiners. The three examples you posted (pet dying, wife leaving, and child being abused) are real problems. These photographers need this community to be here for them when they have these real life problems.
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07/25/2007 12:20:12 AM · #38 |
Well, I've seen a lot of comments about the community aspect of this site.
What some are failing to realize is that people you'd never dream of read these threads, especially when "real" names are tied to profiles, and there have been serious repercussions in both marriages and relationships (even workplaces) as a result of reaching out to the community for this support. Just because the fallout isn't also announced in the forums does not mean that it doesn't occur.
So a word of warning, if you don't want Joe Schmoe from Wherever, Anytown to know your business, don't post it here either. Because you will get caught (trust me on this) and it will be very embarrassing when you do.
In addition, just because you started the thread doesn't mean you get to lock it or hide it when you've changed your mind about spilling your guts, either.
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07/25/2007 01:19:57 AM · #39 |
Originally posted by L2:
...especially when "real" names are tied to profiles... |
Some of us don't have to worry about that. :) |
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07/25/2007 02:34:24 AM · #40 |
For me anyway, a large portion of the appeal DPC holds is precisely because of the personal nature of some of the forum threads. It shows that, to a much greater degree than elsewhere, the members here feel at home and are comfortable sharing. Just like in any real community, some people are willing to share more personal information than others are wanting to hear, I'd rather have a community where people feel open than one where the discussions are strictly impersonal and restricted to photography only.
If you want that, sites with more tightly moderated forums like FredMiranda are a good place to hang out. I have nothing against FM, it's a great site, but the forums discussions are quite a bit more detached. |
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07/25/2007 02:52:02 AM · #41 |
Originally posted by sher:
So you have to read a little of it before you ignore it...it takes just a few seconds out of your day.
For some people, this may be the only place they have to talk about stuff that's bothering them. We work hard to make this place a very friendly community then, what...we're supposed to discourage part of what makes the forums friendly? Like it or not, some people build a family around their internet friends. |
Quite literally, in the OP's case!
~Terry
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07/25/2007 03:23:37 AM · #42 |
Originally posted by rox_rox:
I have a crush on Catherine Zeta-Jones. I am not a lesbian but this is the woman I'd cross the line for. |
Hey! I think that was something I posted! Can't remember exactly though.
The day this becomes a Photography-Only site is the day I go looking for a funner place to hang out. *Art hears roar of a Photography-Only petition signing*
And one last thing, I get Chiqui and Aliqui mixed up. Are they related? |
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07/25/2007 03:25:38 AM · #43 |
Originally posted by Art Roflmao:
The day this becomes a Photography-Only site is the day I go looking for a funner place to hang out. *Art hears roar of a Photography-Only petition signing*
And one last thing, I get Chiqui and Aliqui mixed up. Are they related? |
Could not agree more
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07/25/2007 03:47:54 AM · #44 |
well, i agree with Chiqui ... and while beeing mentioned MikeOwnes thread, i was reading it and felt the same as most reply-ers in that thread but we as "virtual" community will never know the truth behind all this since we are hearing only one side <- this is fact, absolutely nothing against anyone here or any "this kind" of thread starters ... i have no particular reason but i'm very very suspicious about this kind of emotional outbursts :-)
i wanted to reply to MikeOwnes thread but i resisted the urge simply because i knew i cannot help him with few sweet words, that's me.
PS: Mike NHF please, i have absolutely nothing against you or anyone else of course |
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07/25/2007 03:59:24 AM · #45 |
Originally posted by goc:
well, i agree with Chiqui ... and while beeing mentioned MikeOwnes thread, i was reading it and felt the same as most reply-ers in that thread but we as "virtual" community will never know the truth behind all this since we are hearing only one side <- this is fact, absolutely nothing against anyone here or any "this kind" of thread starters ... i have no particular reason but i'm very very suspicious about this kind of emotional outbursts :-)
i wanted to reply to MikeOwnes thread but i resisted the urge simply because i knew i cannot help him with few sweet words, that's me.
PS: Mike NHF please, i have absolutely nothing against you or anyone else of course |
NHF Goran - Mike
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07/25/2007 04:20:44 AM · #46 |
Not sure why a few personal threads here and there hurt anything. The ignore button works, or just skip threads you have no interest in. That's what I do. For those who need an outlet, this is a very friendly community, and with more and more get-togethers, we're getting to meet each other in person as well.
Maybe a "Social" forum - with the option to turn it off like any other - would be a potential solution? Though I do think that the "General Discussion" forum works just fine as is. |
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07/25/2007 05:41:04 AM · #47 |
The point I'm trying to make is that most people wouldn't just walk up to a group of strangers and pour out their most intimate and personal details just because they need to share. Why do it here?
I don't think we can eliminate non photography threads; that would be silly. Like L2 said, I just wish people had a bit more restraint and didn't go into too much personal detail. I am not offended by these threads at all I just don't think DPC is the place for them.
My life is by no means peachy as a matter of fact, it's full of drama just like the next person's; however, I work it in the privacy of my own home/friends’/therapist’s office. Mostly because I don't feel the need to share with the world that I am going through x, y, and z. I wouldn't walk up to a group of strangers and tell them every last bit of detail about my private life so I don't do it here. If I need community support and/or a shoulder to cry on, I go to someone close to me that I know and trust or a therapist.
Like I said in my original post, I see nothing wrong with threads along the lines of baby/marriage/engagement/graduation/what-have-you announcements. Everyone wants to tell the world about those things but please don't go into detail about how the episiotomy ripped and you had a bowel movement following the baby (I don't think anyone's actually started such a thread btw). It's not about elimination, it's about moderation.
June
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07/25/2007 05:56:43 AM · #48 |
I guess my point is while you're not comfortable with sharing details with "strangers", others may be, and why should we limit them? Not everyone has a close circle of friends, or a therapist, and the anonymous nature of a website can often be therapeutic. You make very valid points that when someone does use this venue, that it's documented for all to see - I would think that's up to the person making the post to determine if that's OK with them or not.
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07/25/2007 06:16:33 AM · #49 |
Originally posted by Chiqui:
The point I'm trying to make is that most people wouldn't just walk up to a group of strangers and pour out their most intimate and personal details just because they need to share. Why do it here?
June |
The truth of the matter is these people are not 'strangers' and that is what make this site special. This community has reached out to many people in times of trouble and believe me it is of immense comfort.
Whilst I understand what you are saying I disagree 100 percent, thats my choice. You also have a choice to read threads or not, just because you do not think its right does not make it wrong.
Mike
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07/25/2007 06:21:33 AM · #50 |
Originally posted by MikeOwens:
The truth of the matter is these people are not 'strangers' and that is what make this site special. |
The people who are signed into the site may not be strangers, but unless you post to the members-only forum, it'll be publically readable by anyone and everyone on the internet, and likely to be cached in searchengines etc indefinitely as well...
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